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  #349     or, start at the beginning with #1... OR try out "The Best Of" on hiatus for now  

 
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Thursday, June 2nd, 2011, 2:34pm ET
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I spent my whole life, up until 2008, being allergic to eggs. When I was like 4, I took an egg in my hand, crushed it – obviously just for fun – and got a rash all over my hand. When I was 8, my older brother was into raw egg shakes for some weird reason, and like an idiot he let me have some and I broke into a huge rash all over my torso.

My mom was always super careful about possible allergens because I had skin problems so at various times she wouldn’t let me eat seafood, dairy, peanuts, dogs, cats, you name it. But she would never believe me when I complained that mayonnaise would bother my throat. She just wrote me off like a bratty kid whining about something I didn’t want to eat. It was only much later, after at least a decade of stunted growth, crippling digestive problems and massacred brain cells that I learned that the mayo I kept eating indeed has eggs in it, so ha, Mom, it looks like I got the last laugh.

Fast forward to November 2008… it was the morning after Barack Obama was elected President of the United States, I was celebrating with breakfast at IHOP. Instead of my usual pancakes that I always get, I was in the mood for some hope and change, so I just decided to order a big-ass THREE-EGG OMELETTE. It was the most delicious thing I’d ever had, and I didn’t die. Barack Obama cured my allergy to eggs. Praise the Kenyan gods! And so now I’ve got a lifetime of artery-clogging eggy goodness to catch up on. Mmmmmmmm

Yeah I know that pancakes have eggs in them, shut up.

Hope you enjoyed today’s comic, see you next week, egg willing!!

As a reminder, as I said last week: I’ll be cooling it on the big time-traveling storyline for now, and going old school random for a while in order to get back on the comic horse. The storyline was obviously getting a bit too ambitious on both the plotting and art fronts for my own good, and was (not surprisingly) a major reason why I got all messed up and had to take a break again. In retrospect I shouldn’t have tried it in the first place, given my time constraints and my update schedule. But I hope to continue and finish it one day – hope hope – so those of you who were into it, sorry for now, but I’m willing to bet y’all will be happy with whatever has me making comics regularly again.


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Support aLp yes?   I had one kid too many




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EDIT: The star-rating system is currently down for repairs.

Hey! You can now give a rating, from 1 – 5 stars, to every episode in the archive and all episodes going forward. You see those tiny stars right underneath the comic on each page? Click the appropriate star based on how much you dig that comic relative to all the others in the aLp archive. It’ll even instantly update the average rating and total number of votes before your very eyes, via internet magic.

If you needed another excuse to read through the archives again, this is the best yet! Clicking on those stars is a lot of fun, take it from me. And pretty soon (not quite now) we’ll be able to have a convenient “Best Of” section that new readers can start with, and all you long-time fans can argue about.

Note that you can go to the Archive where each comic has its own set of stars, so if you’re so familiar with ‘em that you can remember ‘em just by their thumbnail, you can blitz through a bunch of ratings really quickly.

ALSO note the new Search box there on the right underneath the ad – you can’t search scripts of comics (yet), but you can search titles and their accompanying blog posts. And you can rate right from the search results.

LASTLY a quick reminder to VOTE for aLp at Top Web Comics!

THANKS!

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Some orders of business!

- I WordPressified the whole site! Among other things this means: 1) anyone can comment on any comic or post now without registering or logging in, 2) blog entries that aren’t tied to a specific comic will now appear as a “true” blog down here, updating with newer posts at the top, and 3) the tag system works better (e.g. here’s all the comics tagged “pee”). I apologize in advance if switching over to the WordPress RSS feed makes all your readers go haywire.

- The Holiday t-shirt sale is still on – 25% off the official aLp t-shirt for both men and women – that’s $12 instead of the usual $16 (+ shipping)! The only sizes I got left, though, are Men’s M and L, and Women’s S and XL. If you or your favorite aLp fan fits one of these sizes, this is your chance to be EVEN SEXIER THAN YOU ARE and proudly wear aLp across your chest without breaking the bank.

- Remember, we had a deal that you’re gonna help me get the word out that aLp is back. Right now I’m gonna go back to trying one of those “webcomic top lists” like I did a long time ago… so please VOTE for aLp on Top Web Comics once a day, every day… for today’s incentive if you vote you get to see a preview of what’s coming down the pipe…

THANKS!

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Last night I tried out that haunted house on the Lower East Side, Nightmare: Bad Dreams Come True, “America’s #1 Haunted House”.

Man was it lame, with a capital Man Was It Lame! I’ve seen scarier things watching Dora the Explorer with my kids. It was just a bunch of college kids paid to jump at you wearing bad costumes. It was too dark to actually see anything that might’ve had a chance to be scary, and yet not dark enough to actually unsettle you. Even just the photos in this old article of 13 Haunted Houses That Will Make You Wet Your Pants (in which this one was named #1!) are scarier than anything that was actually there. The scariest part of the whole time I was there was seriously when I got a text message from my job saying there was a glitch on the site.

Not that I didn’t have a blast last night. I was there with a bunch of friends and the crowd was having fun. Random girls were grabbing onto my hand, which was cool and all, but distracting from the (theoretical) scares. Besides it was too dark to tell what the girls looked like.

Dinner at Cafe Katja beforehand rocked. It’s a tiny Austrian place where they serve pretty much nothing but pork, in a hundred different ways with a thousand different words for them like bratwurst, bernerwurstel, and hefespatenplockasteiner. I made that last one up. And of course, great beer in various and comically large sizes. Check it out on Orchard, between Broome and Grand.

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Hey, that interview I mentioned is now up here, over at Rick Marshall’s blog.

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I just finished doing a couple of interviews where I had to answer the expected questions about the fate of aLp and where the new site is heading, and it helped me be able to explain things with a little more clarity. I owe it to all of you to let you know what’s going on in my head.

aLp is not necessarily over. I did literally say it was “coming to an end”, but that was mostly because I was tired of waffling and dicking you around. I don’t really wanna stop doing it but it bugged me to go on “hiatus” again. But if that’s what we need to call it instead of shutting down altogether, then yeah, ok. I’ll try to keep doing a new aLp update every once in a while because it’s actually still fun. I just need a bit of a break from it.

In terms of IYSS… for those of you who love it and those of you who hate it: I really have no idea where I’m going with it. I mostly just wanted to have somewhere I can draw or write or take a piss with no rules. And right now it feels great, like I just put on a pair of boxers for the first time instead of briefs. Or like I’m having sex without a condom? Or any number of metaphors involving my genitals! Anyway, I’m still finding my way, still learning how to draw, still figuring out what kind of stuff I want to write about, and I’m havin’ a blast. I dunno where it’s all going, but I really appreciate that there’s so many of you comin’ along for the ride.

Thanks, that’s all for now, rock onwards.

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Like I said, I’m starting a new comic. It’s an editorial cartoon, except when it’s not. It’s called:

IF YOU SEE SOMETHING

and it starts now now now. Hope you dig it – if you don’t, well sorry, it’s what I’m doing now… maybe I’ll get better at it as I go along. If you do dig, tell everyone you know! AlienLovesPredator.com’ll be staying up – I’m not sure what I’ll be doing with it, I might eventually do more episodes, I might start taking guest spots – in any case if you were a fan, don’t worry, I won’t be totally ignoring it. The forum‘ll definitely stick around and serve new IYSS readers (should there be any), so keep hangin’ out there. To those of you who ordered stuff from the aLp Shop recently, THANK YOU! You’ll get your order soon.

I LOVE YOU ALL AS ALWAYS.

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I’m just gonna come out and say it: Alien Loves Predator is coming to an end. This may seem sudden, since I recently just “came back”, or you may’ve seen it coming from a mile away. Either way I need to move on for a whole bunch of reasons, not the least of which is I gotta stop breaking promises to ya. BUT…

… I’m planning on starting a new comic, one that hopefully won’t be so frickin stressful for me to keep up (yeah, believe it or not aLp was hard work), and all of you’ll wanna stick around for it cuz 1) I’m writing it, and 2) Abe and Preston may make cameos in some form or another.

I’ll probably write up a more proper farewell post to aLp eventually, but for now, it’s more STAY TUNED until next week when I debut the new series right here. This site’ll keep humming along, and I’ll use the same forums so keep chatting away, and now it’s an imperative you subscribe to the mailing list, RSS, or LJ so you don’t miss the new series. To those of you who won’t be sticking around, thanks a ton for reading.

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Ack… deja vu? Sorry folks but I gotta take THIS week off too – my big deadline was YESTERDAY and I should’ve known that that would mean no new comic for today. Maybe subconsciously I knew, seeing as I didn’t write “see ya next week”.

But SINCE I hit my deadline and it’s OVER, you WILL see a new comic next week FOR SURE.

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Sorry, I gotta take this week off cuz of a big work deadline. Here’s what I was gonna post last week though.

During the weekend of Rachel and Adrian’s 3rd birthday, we went out to Coney Island (2 days after the annual hot dog eating contest was held there). Coney Island’s great cuz it looks like nothing’s changed since World War II – the rides, the bars, the boardwalk, even the people who work there. After enjoying the aquarium (which is actually really nice), we went on to hit the rides, and lemme tell you, it’s awesome to have kids who are finally old enough to go on these things by themselves. Adrian was a big fan of the kiddie coaster, so much so that he kept on pointing at the Cyclone and saying he was going on that next (no dice, pal). Whenever Rachel gets off a ride, she jumps around gleefully and says, “that was SUPAH FUN!” – even the ones on which she spends the whole time with a look on her face like she’s about to throw up.

View of the Cyclone, and the beach, from the top of the (NYC landmark) Wonder Wheel:


 

Even the bathrooms were the same as they were a thousand years ago, which cost 25 cents to use:


 

The “THE NO PAY TOILET LAW DOES NOT APPLY HERE” sign is awesome, cuz not only is there no longer such a law since 1993, but even when there was a ban on pay public toilets in effect (imposed in 1975, since they were deemed discriminatory against women, as men could use urinals for free), what made these bathrooms immune? Is Coney Island some sort of independent country with their own jurisdiction, like the Vatican City? Or Strong Badia? Man, the people I would punch if I could carry around a sign like that.

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Another missed update today, sorry. I ALMOST made it in time; the new comic’s about 80% done but we’re gonna be busy for the long weekend (starting… now) so it’ll have to wait ’til next week.

It’s been suggested that maybe I should go down to bi-weekly – a relaxed schedule I can keep is better than a more aggressive schedule I can’t keep… and there’s no doubt I’ve lost a TON of readers over the past year – but I’m not havin’ that just yet. At the very least I gotta wait ’til I’m past this goddamn storyline – it’s got ONE MORE installment!!! – and then I can get back to the old, sweeter days of just writing whatever the hell pops into my head. Hopefully that’ll get things flowin’ again. If it keeps stressing me out, THEN I’ll consider making a change.

‘Til then, sorry! Join the mailing list, get up in my RSS, or pleasure yourself to my LJ.

In my previous post I broached the subject of torture, allowing for the fact that it’d stir up debate and that I’d be accused of saying things I didn’t say. All I really said was that in any past, current or future use of “torture” by our government, our interrogators most certainly don’t enjoy the causing of pain (whatever the amount) – it’s simply a means to an end, right or wrong. If there were a way to do the same job without it, they’d do it. I don’t think the government’s biggest distractors even disagree with that. It’s just an observation I made.

There’s a small debate going on in the previous post’s comments section. Join in if you wanna, JUST KEEP IT CIVIL. OR ELSE I’LL WATERBOARD YOUR BALLS.

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Alien vs. PredatorTM © 2008 Twentieth Century Fox Film Corporation. Alien and Predator toys © 2008 McFarlane Toys and TMP International, Inc. Other imagery, concept and writing © 2008 Bernie Hou.