The corrupted wish game!

Zifnab · Posted: Sat Jul 23, 2005 1:50 am Post subject: The corrupted wish game!

Now this is how it works...The person above you wishes for...one thousand dollars in cold hard cash.Then The next post would say that it burned or something.Lets start shall we?
I wish for my own Car.(and driving lessons)
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ash_wednesday · Gender: Joined: 12 Jul 2005 Posts: 749 Location: Canadia

Granted, but it breaks down on the highway. As you step out of your car to take a look at it you get hit by another car and go flying into a dead deer.

I wish I had a cookie.
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Bounty · Posted: Sat Jul 23, 2005 3:43 am Post subject:

granted, but you choke and a chocolate chip becomes wedged in your brain. You become a vegetable and a media frendzy.

I wish for knowledge on how to drive a goddamn stickshift
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Needing is Wanting
Wanting is Coveting
Coveting is Sinning
I am SO going to Hell...

Holly Resurrected · Posted: Sat Jul 23, 2005 3:57 am Post subject:

Ah, the monkey paw game. I love it.

Bounty, your wish is granted. You drive a stick like a pro. In fact, you become a pro, racing your stick in the Indi 500. You're rounding a curve, when you lose control and flip your precious stick over the embankment and into the audience in a flaming wreck, killing a dozen and wounding many more. You yourself spend the rest of your life as a scarred freak in a rest home, sans arms and legs.

I wish I could get a career as a comic book artist.
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Garysparry · Gender: Joined: 14 Jul 2005 Posts: 13

Your wish is my command. However your comics offend a gypsy who uses their powerful gypsy magic to make them come alive and stab you. Then continue on a a mad rampage across the world, destroying everything.

I wish Jessica Alba became my girlfriend.
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Munan · Posted: Sat Jul 23, 2005 4:31 am Post subject:

Grahted. The first months are plain heaven. But then the danish side of her family comes for a visit and won't go away. They talk in their horrible language (which isn't so much a language as it is a speaking disorder) all the time, and make your appartment a living hell with their extremely smelly Danish Blue Cheese. You're constantly on the verge of throwing up. Worst of all, the radical Danish cousin fills Jessica's head with feminist ideas and she turns a man-hating lesbian, kicking you out of the house and starting a relationship with your ex-girlfriend while they spread hate-letters about the size of your ***

I wish I became a rock-star the size of Bono.
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Holly Resurrected · Posted: Sat Jul 23, 2005 4:54 am Post subject:

Bounty · Posted: Sat Jul 23, 2005 5:38 am Post subject:

Granted, but when someone with a flesh eating disease comes for healing, you inadvertandly catch it, and, unable to heal yourself, are eaten alive by it.

I wish we had better luck
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Needing is Wanting
Wanting is Coveting
Coveting is Sinning
I am SO going to Hell...

Zifnab · Posted: Sat Jul 23, 2005 2:54 pm Post subject:

granted.so many good things happen then ONE thing goes wrong.You end up in a nut house,and die of old age.
I wish this computer did not run so slow.
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RobinHood3000 · Gender: Joined: 13 Apr 2005 Posts: 224

Sure thing. The computer's processing ability suddenly rivals that of humans, at which point it becomes self-aware and takes over the world, a la Skynet.

I wish I was a superhero.
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Aramor · Posted: Sat Jul 23, 2005 3:14 pm Post subject:

Granted. All of a sudden, all the bad super hero's team up and attack you, leading to your very painful death.

I wish Pred's would finally publicly make contact with us.
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Inkmonkey · Posted: Sat Jul 23, 2005 3:27 pm Post subject:

...too easy.

I wish I had a very small, harmless amount of lint in my pocket.
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AAATripper · Posted: Sat Jul 23, 2005 3:46 pm Post subject:

granted. But then you wash your pants (with the lint inside) and the lint becomes not-so-harmless when it clogs up the washer and causes a water backup and your house (or laundromat) explodes.

I wish i could see better out of my left eye.
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Aramor · Posted: Sat Jul 23, 2005 4:30 pm Post subject:

Granted. But all of a sudden your brain is incapable of processing all the new input and your head implodes.

I wish Enschede would become the capital of Holland.
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Inkmonkey · Posted: Sat Jul 23, 2005 4:48 pm Post subject:

It does... but no one cares or notices.

I wish I were an Oscar Meyer Weiner.
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Bounty · Posted: Sat Jul 23, 2005 5:43 pm Post subject:

granted, and everyone falls in love with you, leading to your horrific death by being raped again and again

I wish this bloody pen would write
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Needing is Wanting
Wanting is Coveting
Coveting is Sinning
I am SO going to Hell...

Aramor · Posted: Sat Jul 23, 2005 5:49 pm Post subject:

Granted. But instead of inkt, there's real blood pouring out... and you can't stop it... so you're about to drown in the blood that can't get out of the room caus the door accidentally closed...

I wish it wouldn't take 20 minutes to render a 4 second animation.
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RobinHood3000 · Gender: Joined: 13 Apr 2005 Posts: 224

Granted. Now it takes 30.

I wish that I had a fedora on my head.
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Grrrr...RAAAAARRRGHHH!!!

...cliiiiiiiiiick...

Aramor · Posted: Sat Jul 23, 2005 6:17 pm Post subject:

Bounty · Posted: Sat Jul 23, 2005 6:22 pm Post subject:

granted, but upon gaining knowledge of everything, your brain becomes larger and larger until it explodes within the skull, and you die painfully.

I wish Spawn was REAL Very Happy

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Needing is Wanting
Wanting is Coveting
Coveting is Sinning
I am SO going to Hell...

Simon_Says · Posted: Sat Jul 23, 2005 6:36 pm Post subject:

...and spawn kills you.. for some reason entirely his.

I wish I was omniscient.
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Crotchfire · Posted: Sat Jul 23, 2005 7:15 pm Post subject:

Granted. You learn that the secret to Life, The Universe, and Everything is 42. You then learn the Ultimate Question which leads to the Ultimate Answer, when makes you forget the Ultimate Answer (due to the fact that the Ultimate Question and the Ultimate Answer cannot be simultaneously known in this dimension. You enter an infinite loop in which you keep learning/forgetting the Ultimate Question/Answer and repeat this process until you die.

I wish I were omnipotent!
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Inkmonkey · Posted: Sat Jul 23, 2005 7:27 pm Post subject:

Granted! But as time goes by you begin to lose interest in everything. You know everything, you see everything, you can do anything. Nothing surprises you, nothing compels, nothing interests you. You realize that there is nothing to strive for, you pray for death but it won't come. You exist outside of such limitations as life and death. Now a cold, indifferent God, you force away all contact with the universe which you control, and pray that there is a force greater than yourself somewhere in this reality that can remove you from this curse.

I wish had a banjo
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Metal_Pred · Posted: Sat Jul 23, 2005 9:01 pm Post subject:

granted, but you suck at it and never get any good.

I wish errrr....I wish....oh! I wish I could have a predator smart disc, there ya go.
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Deathdrop · Gender: Joined: 22 Mar 2005 Posts: 48 Location: USA

Granted. You lop your own head off. I wish for no negitave side effects when I make a wish! (Is that allowed?)
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