Contest II: Haiku - ENTRIES [closed]

Gator · Guest

Apartment too small
Girls like rich, non-monster types
Abe takes cold showers

----------------

Edited by Bernie H. on 4/15/05:

Okay, so in honor of the 100th episode of aLp I'm turning this thread into an official contest.

The aLp HAIKU Contest

Basically, no rules, besides standard haiku rules, and you can post multiple haikus, just don't spam the damn forum. Not sure what I can give away for prizes, or if I can even give away anything... who knows. Just have fun. Your haikus can be about anyhing - aLp, not aLp - they can be funny, or deep, or sad... I'll tell you what, if you can make me cry with a haiku you automatically win.

UPDATE 4/29/05: VIVENDI UNIVERSAL GAMES IS SPONSORING THIS CONTEST in celebration of the launch of Predator: Concrete Jungle for the PS2 and Xbox. Winner gets a free copy of the game! If you don't want it, well, you don't have to take it.

Contest ends this Monday, 5/2, at which point I'll pick some finalists and put it up to a vote. Some additional notes:

- You're more likely to win if your entry is aLp-related.
- Try to limit yourself to 3 entries max. If you've already posted more than 3, please delete the ones you don't want considered.
- 5-7-5, people.

Thanks to "Gator" for starting the thread...

Bernie

Alien King · Guest

My fave comic is
Alien Loves Predator
Bernie H kicks ass.

A xenomorph and
One ugly mother-fucker
In New York City.

Abe tries to find love
But the girls think he's ugly
Back to Playboy then.

Preston's arm is slit
Reattached by doctor's skills.
Hasn't cleaned the blood.

Preston in L.A.
Tried to kill black detective
Got shot in the side.

No money for rent
Abe tried to sell his body
Looked sexy in drag.

desert_drum · Gender: Joined: 01 Feb 2005 Posts: 462

Football in the snow.
Deadly beings have armor
So their nuts don't freeze.

(Left up for the joy of it being here, but don't enter me in the contest; all I could do with the game would be eat it Smile

)
_________________
"I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be." - Douglas Adams

bernieh · Site Admin Gender: Joined: 17 Oct 2004 Posts: 947

Man, what an awesome idea. Love 'em so far. Maybe this should be contest #2. If only I had more crap to give away as prizes.

Oliver · Joined: 02 Nov 2004 Posts: 121 Location: Princeton, NJ

Haikus make me laugh
As I slog through my long day.
Bernie likes it rough.

Thank you, thank you!

Pterodactyl · Joined: 03 Feb 2005 Posts: 19 Location: Southern Appalachia

Empty image stares
where the naked chic once was
MUST order takeout
_________________
Signature Classics.....
"If yesterday were today....
would today....... be tomorrow?
-_______________________-

MY GOD!!! I have HANDS!!!! Why am I not steering the ship?!

Alien King · Gender: Joined: 26 Feb 2005 Posts: 11

I don't know what you had as a prize in the first contest, Bernie, but why not a special one-off comic with whatever the winner wants in it?

Anyway, more Haiku's off the top of my head:

Abe's mom hates his guts
And hates his small appartment
She just wants a girl!!!

The subway is crap
The trains never run on time
"B Train is delayed."

Preston met this guy
Invisible cab driver
Liv Tyler on dash.

Then there was this dwarf
Could not see out the window
Loved the smell of dogs.

Abe will not find love
Why not just move back home to
LV-426?

Preston's bro fought Dutch
In the depths of a jungle
Watch on DVD.

Bounty · Posted: Sun Feb 27, 2005 11:28 am Post subject:

Abe is an ugly guy
Preston is a predator
They love eachother

Very Happy

_________________
Needing is Wanting
Wanting is Coveting
Coveting is Sinning
I am SO going to Hell...

Treach · Gender: Joined: 22 Dec 2004 Posts: 77

Kiera Knightley's hot
Chestburster couldn't break through
That rock hard torso

brianna · Gender: Joined: 07 Mar 2005 Posts: 4

Need to pay the rent
Abe wants Chinese food again
Let’s just have a beer

TeratoMarty · Guest

Abe gets novel job
Maiming middle-management.
Wealth attracts fly 'hos.

Mr. Z · Posted: Wed Apr 06, 2005 1:51 pm Post subject:

Alien's toxic blood
predator's glowing green blood
Mix it all up. OW!!
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WLeader of AOPATEOAOP. Join or be face-hugged!

Drone Daddy · Guest

New To The Haiku,
Children often write it like
Poo is solid gold

Such was I when I
Began but now I see that
It beats term papers

----------------------------------

Sharp with a pen, and
I want to co-write for you
Bernie hire me

----------------------------------

Cheers,

Drone Daddy

shale_d2010@yahoo.com

tenchi89 · Gender: Joined: 18 Mar 2005 Posts: 24 Location: Orlando

Abe Lives With Preston
Adventuring Around Town
No They're Not Gay

TeratoMarty · Guest

Male intimacy
Friendship blooms with awareness-
Did you just cut one?

Bad Karma · Posted: Tue Apr 12, 2005 8:29 am Post subject:

With crappy eyesight
Abe will soon be half a man
But he'll grow it back

bernieh · Site Admin Gender: Joined: 17 Oct 2004 Posts: 947

Okay, so in honor of the 100th episode of aLp I'm turning this thread into an official contest.

The aLp HAIKU Contest

Basically, no rules, besides standard haiku rules, and you can post multiple haikus, just don't spam the damn forum. Not sure what I can give away for prizes, or if I can even give away anything... who knows. Just have fun. Your haikus can be about anyhing - aLp, not aLp - they can be funny, or deep, or sad... I'll tell you what, if you can make me cry with a haiku you automatically win.

Thanks to "Gator" for starting the thread...

Bernie

FarcePest · Gender: Joined: 15 Apr 2005 Posts: 4

Blame Abe and Preston,
Wacky roommates in New York:
They ate Friends, Seinfeld.

meese · Joined: 15 Apr 2005 Posts: 1

Abe and Preston are
Single guys in NYC
I’ve seen uglier.

Gabriel · Joined: 31 Jan 2005 Posts: 4 Location: Bronx, NY

Tale as old as time -
Alien loves Predator
Beauty and the Beast

AaronEmerson · Posted: Fri Apr 15, 2005 4:45 pm Post subject:

Lunch at the Shake Shack
Preston will ride the rest home.
Some bloody, buddy?

Twenty-six Series.
How'd they blow a three-game lead?!?
Steinbrenner's a pud.
_________________
"Your reality, sir, is lies and balderdash, and I am delighted to say that I have no grasp of it whatsoever."

The Sherpa · Gender: Joined: 15 Apr 2005 Posts: 29

O! Spongebob Squarepants,
Your body so full of holes...
Why must you be male?

Shurimpu · Joined: 15 Apr 2005 Posts: 8

Oh no! Space Monkeys
Are attacking! God help us!
No one hears your screams
_________________
Why are you reading my signature? So, I have to entertain you now? Forget that. Read a book. Play a videogame. kill a homeless pers- Feed some orphans. That's what I meant.

Drone Daddy · Gender: Joined: 13 Apr 2005 Posts: 92

I'm an engineer
At work today, I blew up
a wall transformer

Boss will keep me on
But from now on, I cannot
Pour drinks in wall plugs

=======================

Skazulab · Posted: Fri Apr 15, 2005 5:56 pm Post subject:

Jesus lives with Psychos
Shouldn't he have a studio?
He's on the Yankees!
_________________
This Space For Rent

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