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Simon_Says
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 Posted: Tue Sep 23, 2008 3:12 pm Post subject: Urinal Etiquette |
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| Sgnt. Johnson wrote: | | The bathrooms stink! Men cannot hit. Is it so hard to hit it men? I... I sit down! When I lived with my lady I sat down... Well she made me sit down but THAT'S A DIFFERENT STORY! |
So many urinals, so few people who give a damn how to behave in them. They swagger with complete indifference to any urinal they choose and damn to hell whoever's next to it. Or using it for that matter.
Two things guys. First, don't place your hands on your hips with pelvis thrust forward while you whiz. You look like a pornstar being pleasured by the urinal, and no one wants to have their retinas forcefully drawn to your exposed free-floating junk.
Second, for God's sake take the time to zip up after you're down when you're still at the urinal. Again your willy is reserved only for You and Mrs. You, and would you like it when someone drips across the floor your standing on, or on your shoes for that matter? I thought so.
Guys, what else should the world know about urinal etiquette?
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Aurelyn
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| Posted: Wed Sep 24, 2008 6:34 am Post subject: |
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Put a cork in the bowl - it gives guys something to aim at, resulting in a cleaner bathroom.
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| Master Chainsaw wrote: | | Aurelyn becomes enraged by imbecilic displays of illiteracy, as is his wont. |
| Simon_Says wrote: | | Sal would know. He stole many jobs from guys named Shaun. |
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Munan
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| Posted: Wed Sep 24, 2008 7:00 am Post subject: Re: Urinal Etiquette |
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| Simon_Says wrote: | | don't place your hands on your hips with pelvis thrust forward while you whiz. You look like a pornstar being pleasured by the urinal, and no one wants to have their retinas forcefully drawn to your exposed free-floating junk. |
Are there people who actually do that? What is the world coming to, etc. etc.
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Simon_Says
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| Posted: Wed Sep 24, 2008 9:08 am Post subject: |
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I made this thread ten minutes after seeing both of those happening, by the same guy.
What has been seen cannot be unseen.
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cfos
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| Posted: Wed Sep 24, 2008 9:56 am Post subject: Re: Urinal Etiquette |
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| Munan wrote: | | Simon_Says wrote: | | don't place your hands on your hips with pelvis thrust forward while you whiz. You look like a pornstar being pleasured by the urinal, and no one wants to have their retinas forcefully drawn to your exposed free-floating junk. |
Are there people who actually do that? What is the world coming to, etc. etc. |
Older people (elderly) tend to do this.
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Aramor
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| Posted: Wed Sep 24, 2008 10:19 am Post subject: Re: Urinal Etiquette |
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| Simon_Says wrote: | | Guys, what else should the world know about urinal etiquette? |
I for one hate it when women start complaining we left the toilet seat up. I mean, is it so hard for them to put it down? It was up so we didn't pee on it, so it's not like it's dirty or something. And something else, it costs way more energy to put it up when it's down then vice versa. I mean, you just gotta give it small nudge and gravity does the rest.
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Azrael
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| Posted: Thu Sep 25, 2008 1:00 am Post subject: |
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Here's a simple one that alot of people forget.
Wash your fucking hands after you finish your leak.
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Aurelyn
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| Posted: Thu Sep 25, 2008 7:44 am Post subject: |
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| Azrael wrote: | Here's a simple one that alot of people forget.
Wash your fucking hands after you finish your leak. |
I prefer to wash my hands before I take a piss. I can reasonably assume that during most times of the day my hands are much dirtier than my flute.
Sometimes I wash them after too, but only if I pissed on them.
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| Master Chainsaw wrote: | | Aurelyn becomes enraged by imbecilic displays of illiteracy, as is his wont. |
| Simon_Says wrote: | | Sal would know. He stole many jobs from guys named Shaun. |
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Simon_Says
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| Posted: Thu Sep 25, 2008 11:00 am Post subject: |
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An Oxford man and a Cambridge man both go the urinal. The Oxford man finishes first and starts washing his hands at the sink. The Cambridge man then finishes and heads straight for the door. "At Oxford they teach us to wash our hands after we urinate." "At Cambridge they teach us not to piss on our hands."
Another horror story. I was at the urinal and another guy joins in. He says "Nice watch you got there." But he was on my right and I wear my watch on my left hand... Guys, please oh please just try to stare through the wall in front of you.
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Last edited by Simon_Says on Tue Oct 07, 2008 3:39 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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cfos
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| Posted: Thu Sep 25, 2008 11:03 am Post subject: |
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| Azrael wrote: | Here's a simple one that alot of people forget.
Wash your fucking hands after you finish your leak. |
Do you pee on your hands? Technically, urine is sterile (until it reacts with the environment, oxidizes, etc.). Besides, in public restrooms, you gotta think that all the deficators are washing their hands... touching the faucets (assuming they aren't the techno-advanced no-touch faucets). I'd argue that you could become more contiminated by germs by washing your hands (assuming you turn off the faucet after washing off the previous germs...) unless there are sufficient paper towels that can be employed.
'nother question, if one washes their hands either before, after or both... what should a fellator do prior to their performance?
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Azrael
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| Posted: Thu Sep 25, 2008 3:32 pm Post subject: |
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What kind of marksman pisses on his own hands?
But it just seems proper to wash your hands in the bathroom after use. Actually I try to avoid using public restrooms altogether after a horrifying incident 9 years ago. Don't ask. I only use public restrooms when I need to.
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Frost
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| Posted: Thu Sep 25, 2008 11:06 pm Post subject: |
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| Azrael wrote: | What kind of marksman pisses on his own hands?
But it just seems proper to wash your hands in the bathroom after use. Actually I try to avoid using public restrooms altogether after a horrifying incident 9 years ago. Don't ask. I only use public restrooms when I need to. |
...
........
I'm asking: What happened?
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Azrael
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| Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2008 12:01 am Post subject: |
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| Frost wrote: | | I'm asking: What happened? |
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Simon_Says
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| Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2008 9:29 am Post subject: |
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| Azrael wrote: | | Please ask. |
Okay I'm asking too, what happened?
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cfos
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| Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2008 10:30 am Post subject: |
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My Guess?
Az = George Michaels (in real life)
gots to have faith-fu-faith-fuf-fu-faitH!
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Aurelyn
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| Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2008 11:47 am Post subject: |
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| cfos wrote: | | Azrael wrote: | Here's a simple one that alot of people forget.
Wash your fucking hands after you finish your leak. |
Do you pee on your hands? Technically, urine is sterile (until it reacts with the environment, oxidizes, etc.). Besides, in public restrooms, you gotta think that all the deficators are washing their hands... touching the faucets (assuming they aren't the techno-advanced no-touch faucets). I'd argue that you could become more contiminated by germs by washing your hands (assuming you turn off the faucet after washing off the previous germs...) unless there are sufficient paper towels that can be employed.
'nother question, if one washes their hands either before, after or both... what should a fellator do prior to their performance? |
I'd rather they brushed their teeth, but it's not like I'm going to make an issue of it either. 
Unless they'd been eating chillies.
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| Master Chainsaw wrote: | | Aurelyn becomes enraged by imbecilic displays of illiteracy, as is his wont. |
| Simon_Says wrote: | | Sal would know. He stole many jobs from guys named Shaun. |
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Satan Crime Wash
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| Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2008 12:27 pm Post subject: |
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| Aurelyn wrote: | | Unless they'd been eating chillies. |
Or broken glass.
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InvaderJess
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| Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2008 4:28 pm Post subject: |
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| Personally, I'd prefer it if you washed your hands afterwards, because then you go touch things. Or shake someone's hand. And really, I wanna make sure that everytime I'm shakin some guys hands, there's not cock germs all over it.... Just sayin' |
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Aurelyn
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| Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 6:04 am Post subject: |
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| InvaderJess wrote: | | Personally, I'd prefer it if you washed your hands afterwards, because then you go touch things. Or shake someone's hand. And really, I wanna make sure that everytime I'm shakin some guys hands, there's not cock germs all over it.... Just sayin' |
But hand germs are far more likely to be bad than cock germs. I shower twice a day, for example. For the most part, during the interval between those two events, the only thing my cock touches is the inside of my clean boxers. Think of what your hands touch every day, and how often you wash them.
I guess STD's would probably fall under the mandate of a 'bad' cock germ though.
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Da Fro-mastah of da aLp Forums!
| Master Chainsaw wrote: | | Aurelyn becomes enraged by imbecilic displays of illiteracy, as is his wont. |
| Simon_Says wrote: | | Sal would know. He stole many jobs from guys named Shaun. |
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Aramor
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| Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 10:08 am Post subject: |
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| Simon_Says wrote: | | Azrael wrote: | | Please ask. |
Okay I'm asking too, what happened? |
He probably saw some musician sucking on the sleeve of a guy wearing a red Pendleton shirt...
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Azrael
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| Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2008 8:17 pm Post subject: |
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| Simon_Says wrote: | | Azrael wrote: | | Please ask. |
Don't tell me. |
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Tleilaxu
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| Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2008 4:36 pm Post subject: |
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No talking, unless you are friends with the person you are engaging in a conversation with. I hate it when people try tro talk with me when I am doing my business.
Also when possible leave at least one urinal space between you and the next person if the bathroom is pretty much vaccant. Crowding is only tolerable when the bathroom is full*And or in emergancy situations LOL*... otherwise give a man his space.
And for god sakes PLEASE flush the toilets unrinalsm when finished. Thanx |
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Aramor
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| Posted: Mon Sep 29, 2008 6:23 am Post subject: |
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| Tleilaxu wrote: | | the toilets unrinalsm |
The what?
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| Syn wrote: | | your balls didn't get suck |
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Satan Crime Wash
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| Posted: Mon Sep 29, 2008 11:42 am Post subject: |
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| Aramor© wrote: | | Tleilaxu wrote: | | the toilets unrinalsm |
The what? |
Pff, everyone's heard of those except you, you gimp.
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Aramor
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| Posted: Mon Sep 29, 2008 3:24 pm Post subject: |
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Oh, just because I sometimes like to put on a leather suit while I'm having sex with 4 different men you call me a gimp. Well, that's very open minded of you.
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| Photoshopperholic wrote: | | Mighty Lord Aramor |
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| Syn wrote: | | your balls didn't get suck |
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