I Came up with a Philosophical Argument Against Furries

Carlo Sandiego

So, I was trying to fathom the arcane and fundamentally fucked-up secret of why furries exist the other day, when I came upon a most fascinating conclusion. Bear with me on this; it's rather overserious, and was birthed by the triple-headed hydra of low sleep, too much free time and online chat.

Once more into the breach!

Contention: Identifying strongly with an animal is by no means a particularly unusual activity in human history.
Subpoint A: This identification has often involved anthropomorphization of said animal.
Subpoint B: This identification has regularly involved a desire to take on characteristics of the aforementioned animal.
Subpoint C: in extreme cases, it has included the belief that one can transform into said animal.
Conclusion: The most common characteristics of "Furries" have been shared by a vast number of previous human cultures and traditions.

Conundrum: Furries are regarded as abominable and deviant, whereas shamanic traditions are regarded as merely weird.

The solution?

For much of human history, humans have identified with, anthropomorphized, and desired characteristics (whether physical or mental) of said animals. Why then are Furies despicable?

For one reason: practicality.

Viking Berserks ("Bear Shirts") presumably derived a certain portion of their confidence and rage in battle from their totemistic identification with wolves and bears. The dances and ceremonies of many Native American cultures were intended to achieve practical results for the tribe--better hunting, more fertility, success in war, etc.--and at the very least, performed the function of cementing the social group together and motivating them to achieve more. Identification with an animal was meant to help a person--a spirit guide in the shape of a bear, for instance, would (ideally) make one take on certain characteristics of the bear: strength, stubbornness, success, endurance.

Furries, however, have apparently disregarded this legacy of using totemistic identification with animals to achieve(or try to achieve) practical results and positive lifestyle change. Instead of learning new and useful skills in order to better "fit" their chosen "fursona," they write horrible short stories, discuss their lives on forums, make pathetically deviant pornography, and whine about being persecuted. This is unconscionable!

If an individual identifies with an animal, they should do something USEFUL with that psychological inclination! If one wants to be/feels like/identifies with wolves, one should "take on" some characteristics of a wolf--learn to fight! Exercise! learn to survive in the wilderness! Try, in short, to achieve comprehensive and positive lifestyle change!

It is still odd and rather deviant to identify with animals more than with one's fellow human beings. But if a furry leverages their strange inclinations to achieve practical and intelligent life goals, then no one can say that said furry is not, at the least, strong-willed and willing to work hard and sacrifice.

In short: if you are going to be odd and socially deviant, at least use your unique (and thoroughly strange) desires to make a positive contribution to society rather than growing steadily more perverse, obese, shrill, and illiterate.

Or at least learn to go into a crazed state of combative rage unmatched by any living individual not on Phencyclidine since the Viking Age.

...

DISCUSS.
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Aurelyn · Posted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 2:41 pm Post subject:

Simon_Says · Posted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 3:36 pm Post subject:

Frankly I don't really care much. They've got a fascination with animals/anthromorphs, so what? As Aurelyn said, in the field of psychological deviances, being a furry is relatively innocuous.

Of course, as with all things, it can become an obsession for some, which does cause problems.

As for why society in general seems to hate furry fandom, it's usually because the most extreme cases are always presented. People who put on costumes to have sex and such. Western society in general seems to be very reactionary when it comes to sexuality in general. It's kind of revealing when people insult furries with the term 'furfags', tying them to another group of 'sexual deviants'.
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cfos · Posted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 4:01 pm Post subject:

Take two, they're small:

For the record, I agree with Aurelyn and Simon
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Simon_Says · Posted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 4:06 pm Post subject:

What, you do give a rat's ass?
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cfos · Posted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 4:41 pm Post subject:

Azrael · Posted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 4:44 pm Post subject:

Alot of furries take on these 'fursonas' merely as a fetish. Adding animal characteristics to people or making animals more humanlike is something that causes sexual fascination because they are still vaguely human/compatable. Most furries have avatars of their favorite animals, and generally leave it as that. Sometimes they do behave like their respective avatars to add more to the extoic nature, and ironically many furries find that very odd, though understandably it's all for fun. Though 'furry' is a pretty subjective term, because most people believe all it takes to be a furry is have an anthro as an avatar in their own art. They are odd people, but everyone has their quirks.

I just realized how awkward this is. My avatar is a cat, though it's a joke to anyone who knows who this cat is. Besides, I am not a cat person. =P
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Simon_Says · Posted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 4:50 pm Post subject:

It doesn't help that there's a dozen varieties of furry out there.

cfos · Posted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 4:52 pm Post subject:

Azrael · Posted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 4:52 pm Post subject:

They even have their own wiki.
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Only the strongest will survive.

Married to SpideyGirl.

cfos · Posted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 4:53 pm Post subject:

Simon_Says · Posted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 4:54 pm Post subject:

I take it I'm in the closet too?

Also, fun fact, many superheroes/villains are furries. Batman, catwoman, penguin, spiderman, wolverine, beast, etc.

Yeah. Batman's a furry. Deal with it.
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cfos · Posted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 4:55 pm Post subject:

we all are
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"If wishes were horses, we'd all be eating steak."

Simon_Says · Posted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 4:56 pm Post subject:

Cue the "South Park" quotes.
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Azrael · Posted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 4:56 pm Post subject:

Simon_Says · Posted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 4:57 pm Post subject:

If "I'm not a catperson" is not a denial, I don't know what is.

Also, I'm past my 5555 mark. Shazam.
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Azrael · Posted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 4:58 pm Post subject:

It simply means if I were confirmed to be a furry, cat is not my thing.
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Only the strongest will survive.

Married to SpideyGirl.

cfos · Posted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 4:59 pm Post subject:

No; but, you hid it with white font. I'm sure all this craze will blow over. I mean, the Renn-faire guy's avatar is smoking 900 cigarettes. He is too orally fixated to maintain a focus on us. Besides, cancer will likely be the end of his fetish. And if that don't work, will ask Aurelyn's avatar's cult to back us up.
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"If wishes were horses, we'd all be eating steak."

Azrael · Posted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 4:59 pm Post subject:

And my location reveals I'm in a drity hovel, that's hawt.

And I've hidden loads of notes in alot of my posts. Few I regret.
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Only the strongest will survive.

Married to SpideyGirl.

cfos · Posted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 5:01 pm Post subject:

Azrael · Posted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 5:03 pm Post subject:

In a matter of time, this whole thing will collapse in on itself and we will all go back to making dik-dik jokes.
_________________
Only the strongest will survive.

Married to SpideyGirl.

cfos · Posted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 5:03 pm Post subject:

cfos · Posted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 5:05 pm Post subject:

Simon_Says · Posted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 5:10 pm Post subject:

IMMA PRINCE BILL, AND IMMA THROWIN MY SPE-AR!!! BLAWOAOWAAWAWRGH!
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Azrael · Posted: Tue Apr 07, 2009 5:14 pm Post subject:

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