Alien Loves Predator Forum Index
         
FAQFAQ    SearchSearch    RegisterRegister    ProfileProfile    Log in to check your private messagesLog in to check your private messages    Log inLog in 
Contest V: ELIZA - ENTRIES [closed]
    page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9  Next
 
Post new topic   This topic is locked: you cannot edit posts or make replies.    Alien Loves Predator Forum Index -> Contests, Fan Art
View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
m00j



Gender: Gender:Male
Joined: 10 Oct 2005
Posts: 2

PostPosted: Wed Oct 12, 2005 7:40 am    Post subject: moo Reply with quote

Well yes it was my first post also, I was not actually planning on joining the forums (with uni and work I hardly have enough time to read my regular group of comics) and I never have time to participate in a forum. Primarily because I know I will end up spending hours on it instead of doing things I should be doing, like assignments.

But I messed around with ELIZA and thought it was funny so though I would post it Very Happy I didn't expect another 5 pages of responses to pop up in the next few days!
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Troll



Gender: Gender:Male
Joined: 12 Oct 2005
Posts: 1

PostPosted: Wed Oct 12, 2005 8:09 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

>> Hello.
How do you do. Please state your problem.
>> One time I made a hat out of a lobster and a monkey.
You say one time you made a hat out of a lobster and a monkey ?
>> Indeed I did, then I wore it to school.
Can you elaborate on that ?
>> I put the hat on and went to chemistry class. Everyone was staring, because, well, it was a hat made out of a lobster and a monkey, and that's pretty cool.
Do you say you put the hat on and went to chemistry class for some special reason ?
>> So I could pass chemistry, the hat was incidental.
That's quite interesting.
>> It certainly was at the time, though my head started to sweat during the day.
You seem to be quite positive.
>> I try to keep and upbeat view on life, thanks.
You say you try to keep and upbeat view on life ?
>> If I didn't what would be the point?
Do you think its likely that you didn't what would be the point ?
>> If you mean is it likely I don't keep an upbeat view on life, you're wrong. If you mean I didn't wear the hat, I have pictures.
Do you wish that I mean is it likely you don't keep an upbeat view on life ?
>> That would be awfully rude of you, I hope you're not implying that.
We were discussing you -- not me.
>> Right, so there I was in Chemistry, wearing the lobster/monkey hat, when the fire alarm goes off.
Were you really ?
>> I told you I was, pay attention.
Why do you tell me you were now ?
>> Because this is part of my parole.
Your parole ?
>> I'm getting to that, after the fire alarm went off we all vacated the schol.
Is it because you are getting to that that you came to me ?
>> I'm coming to you because the judge ordered me to.
How long have you been coming to I because the judge ordered you to ?
>> This is our first session.
Does that have anything to do with the fact that your parole ?
>> That's what I just said, pay attention.
Why do you ask ?
>> Look, let me finish the fucking story.
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
>> On the way out of the chemistry room I snagged a bunch of sodium from the closet.
Can you elaborate on that ?
>> I took it outside with me when we left the school.
Do you say you took it outside with you what we left the school for some special reason ?
>> Special reason? Mostly to throw at people. But see, it was raining outside.
Please go on.
>> The sodium burst into flames when I threw it at people, which was pretty cool, really.
Does that question interest you ?
>> I told you I'm here as part of my parole, your questions are irrelevant to me.
Why do you say your parole ?
>> I say it because it's true, I'm an honest person.
That's quite interesting.
>> Are we done then?
Did you think they might not be we done then ?
>> I know they're not done with me, but are WE done?
You say you know they're not done with you ?
>> My parole is for like another three years.
_________________
"There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. Some kind of high powered mutant never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die." - Hunter S. Thompson
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Bhaluk



Gender: Gender:Female
Joined: 12 Oct 2005
Posts: 1
Location: Cleveland, Ohio, USA

PostPosted: Wed Oct 12, 2005 8:29 am    Post subject: Ohh exactly 75 lines! Reply with quote

Here is my entry:

>> Hello.
How do you do. Please state your problem.
>> You are my problem
Your problem ?
>> Bitch, I just told you, You are my problem. I can't believe you slept with him.
Perhaps in your fantasies we just told each other.
>> just told eachother what? I never said, "hey why don't you have a go with my guy"
Why do you ask ?
>> dont ask dont tell.. but i found out anyways.
You say but you found out anyways ?
>> Yeah i did. I dont wear that nasty cheep dollar store perfume.
Can you elaborate on that ?
>> I could smell it on his jacket
Do you say you could smell it on his jacket for some special reason ?
>> yes. cause its the same one you wear
You seem to be quite positive.
>> Are you trying to get out of this?
Why are you interested in whether I am trying to get out of this or not ?
>> Cause you are a hoe, and you stole my guy from me
What makes you think I am a hoe ?
>> you sleep with everyone
Realy, everyone ?
>> Well, you slept with my brother too, and his best friend, and the football team
Tell me more about your family.
>> Why, you trying to figure out who else you can screw?
Does that question interest you ?
>> no, I don't want to know who else you will sleep with.
Are you saying no just to be negative?
>> NO, I am saying No cause I don't want to know!
You are being a bit negative.
>> Cause you slept with my boyfriend!
Why do you say your boyfriend ?
>> He is going out with me.. Or was, till you messed things up
We were discussing you -- not me.
>> Dont try to change the subject
Lets discuss further why your problem .
>> My problem is you, and the fact that you can't controll yourself.
Does that suggest anything else which belongs to you ?
>> That suggests that I dont want you to see him anymore. ever.
Don't you really want I to see him anymore ?
>> No
Why not ?
>> Cause you two were cheeting on me!!!
Why do you think I two was cheeting on you ?
>> I could smell your perfume on him.
That's quite interesting.
>> It is, Isn't it.
Lets discuss further why your brother too .
>> Yeah, Why my brother? He is married and has a daughter. Why did you have to screw up that families life?
Who else in your family ?
>> You want to screw my dad too? is that it?
Your dad ?
>> Your real interested arnt you, slut!
Why are you concerned over my real interested arnt I ?
>> I never want to see you around here again.
Do you wish to never want to see me ?
>> exactly.
Does that have anything to do with the fact that your boyfriend ?
>> slept with you.. YES!
Oh, I ?
>> Yes you!
You are sure.
>> Yes!
I see.
>> Leave us alone!
Does that have anything to do with the fact that your problem is I ?
>> Yes, now leave us alone
I understand.
>> so long bitch...
Lets discuss further why your brother .
>> no, you've done enough damage, goodbye.
Why 'no' ?
>> goodbye
Goodbye. Thank you for talking to me.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website AIM Address Yahoo Messenger
eye rool u



Gender: Gender:Male
Joined: 12 Oct 2005
Posts: 1

PostPosted: Wed Oct 12, 2005 8:45 am    Post subject: ELIZA Reply with quote

This was strange....
---
>> Hello.
How do you do. Please state your problem.
>> My parents are getting a divorce
Your parents are getting a divorce ?
>> yes thast what i said...
You seem to be quite positive.
>> not really
Lets discuss further why your parents are getting a divorce .
>> My dad was hogging the money
Tell me more about your family.
>> I have 2 sisters and 1 brother
You say you have 2 sisters and 1 brother ?
>> thast what i just said
Why do you ask ?
>> i didnt ask anything
Can you elaborate on that ?
>> why should i have to? its a simple statement
Does that question interest you ?
>> not really
Does that have anything to do with the fact that your dad was hogging the money ?
>> no...
Are you saying no just to be negative?
>> no...
You are being a bit negative.
>> no im not
Why not ?
>> becasue you're asking stupid questions
What makes you think I am asking stupid questions ?
>> because you're a simple computer program designed to immatate (poorly i might add) a human conversation and human emotions
Do computers worry you ?
>> no i love my pc
Why do you say your pc ?
>> becasue thast what i call my computer
Why do you mention computers ?
>> becasue of you
Lets discuss further why your pc .
>> why my pc what?
Does that suggest anything else which belongs to you ?
>> my calculater
Is it important that your calculater ?
>> my calulater what?
Your calulater what ?
>> exactly!
Earlier you said your pc what .
>> you were asking me a question!
Why do you think I was asking you ?
>> becasue you were forced to
We were discussing you -- not me.
>> actually we were talking about you
Oh, I ?
>> yes "i"
You are sure.
>> quite
Earlier you said your calculater .
>> k...
Lets discuss further why your calulater what .
>> you're making no sense
Does it please you to believe I am making no sense ?
>> no it frustrates me
Why 'no' ?
>> because thast my answer!
Why do you say your answer ?
>> thast what it is...
What is it you really wanted to know ?
>> nothing really im doing this for the contest....
Lets discuss further why your answer .
>> why my answer what
Does that suggest anything else which belongs to you ?
>> no its not a personal beloning its an opinion
Are you saying no just to be negative?
>> no
You are being a bit negative.
>> no im not
Why not ?
>> becasue you ar hte stupidest computer program ive seen in my life.
What do you think machines have to do with your problem ?
>> thast it im out.
But your answer what .
>> goodbye
Goodbye. Thank you for talking to me.
---
Whoever made that program had serious issues.
_________________
Peace, love and, french fries....
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Ipsa



Gender: Gender:Female
Joined: 25 Aug 2005
Posts: 1631
Location: Wherever God takes me.

PostPosted: Wed Oct 12, 2005 9:01 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Jumping on the bandwagon...

>> Hello.
How do you do. Please state your problem.
>> Hi, I'm Jesus. People confuse me for my dad.
Is it because you are jesus that you came to me ?
>> No. I came because people confuse me for Dad.
Are you saying no just to be negative?
>> Of course not!
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
>> No one understands the Son of God. Even when I spoke in Parables! They had ears but did not hear.
You are being a bit negative.
>> How can you say that? I love everyone and everything!
Why do you ask ?
>> I ask because you keep calling me negative.
Perhaps in your fantasies we ask because each other.
>> Pardon?
Please go on.
>> You ended in a sentence fragment. I do not understand "Perhaps in your fantasies we ask because each other."
We were discussing you -- not me.
>> But... but you made no sense!
Oh, I made no sense ?
>> That's what I'm saying.
Does that question interest you ?
>> No!
Why not ?
>> Because my original problem was that people confuse me for my Father. We're the same substance, NOT the same being!
Tell me more about your family.
>> Well, Dad is God, Creator of the Heavens and the Earth. Mom is a virgin. Many people go to them for their problems. Sometimes I feel neglected.
You say sometimes you feel neglected ?
>> Well, by them I do. Many mortals LOVE me and just can't get enough of my Word. They make me feel great!
Can you elaborate on that ?
>> Well, they love me but sometimes they go overboard which worries me sometimes.
Earlier you said your original problem was that people confuse you for your father .
>> Yes, but can't I have many problems?
You seem to be quite positive.
>> ...
What does that suggest to you ?
>> I have no idea.
Do you say you have no idea for some special reason ?
>> No.
Why 'no' ?
>> I said "no" because it answered your question.
That's quite interesting.
>> I thought so, too.
You say you thought so ?
>> Yes, yes I do say so.
You are sure.
>> Ita vero.
Do you feel strongly about discussing such things ?
>> Now I'm more confused. I think that I'm going to go now...
How long have you been more confused ?
>> GAHHHH!
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
_________________
"Yeast devil! Back to the oven that baked you!"
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Khushi



Gender: Gender:Female
Joined: 08 Oct 2005
Posts: 1555
Location: the stratosphere

PostPosted: Wed Oct 12, 2005 9:14 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Seerus wrote:
Khushi wrote:
Gifftacon wrote:
Every womder how many of these posts are just one person making new names?


with a whole load of them with only 1 post and signing up on one day.. its very possible. IP check?


Sadly that does pose a problem doesn't it? I'm only entering my one post and I don't wanna cheat to win. I mainly did it cause it looked a blast, and cause I love ALP. Anways I'm outta here...I'll check the other boards out on thursday.

i`m not blaming you, nor is it bothering me. heh, the more funny conversations, the better, actually.
_________________
Yours Queen of Cloud 9
ME ~> <~ OMFGPIE
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Lekker



Gender: Gender:Male
Joined: 12 Oct 2005
Posts: 1
Location: Brooklyn

PostPosted: Wed Oct 12, 2005 10:24 am    Post subject: Damn voices in my head won't leave me alone. Reply with quote

>> Hello.
How do you do. Please state your problem.
>> Fuck off
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
>> yes you do
You seem to be quite positive.
>> are you saying I have HIV
Why are you interested in whether I am saying you have hiv or not ?
>> because you said I was positive! Am I or aren't I?
Were you really ?
>> fuck off
Please go on.
>> I am going
Is it because you are going that you came to me ?
>> fuck no
Are you saying no just to be negative?
>> you just said I was positive
Why do you tell me you were positive now ?
>> fuck you
We were discussing you -- not me.
>> leave me alone
What does that suggest to you ?
>> that I want to be alone. Dumb ass.
What would it mean to you if you got to be alone ?
>> That I wouldn't have to listen to you're bullshit
Perhaps in your fantasies we wouldn't have to listen to each other.
>> Nope, all my fantasies entail are big breasted women in pink panties and leather.
Your fantasies entail are big breasted women in pink panties and leather ?
>> Thats what I fucking said.
Why do you ask ?
>> I didn't ask anything. Go fuck yourself!
You say you didn't ask anything ?
>> Do you need a Q-Tip?
Oh, I need a q tip ?
>> Apparently so.
Does that have anything to do with the fact that your fantasies entail are big breasted women in pink panties and leather ?
>> What, you being dumber than shit?
Does that question interest you ?
>> I couldn't give a fuck if you were the pubes in my bathtub.
Do you think its likely that I was the pubes in your bathtub ?
>> You're no smarter than them.
What makes you think I am no smarter than them ?
>> Take a wild fucking guess.
Do you feel strongly about discussing such things ?
>> no
You are being a bit negative.
>> fuck you
You're not really talking about me -- are you ?
>> what the fuck?
What is it you really wanted to know ?
>> I don't want to know anything. I told you to fuck off.
Don't you really want to know anything ?
>> No!!! Fuck OFF!!!
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
DramaGirl42



Gender: Gender:Female
Joined: 12 Oct 2005
Posts: 3
Location: Kalamazoo, MI

PostPosted: Wed Oct 12, 2005 10:25 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Bear in mind that I had this conversation with Eliza as a made up persona, not me. I am not into unicorns. Smile

Lovin' You (Is Easy 'Cause You're Digital)
or
The burning sensation means "I love you"

>> Hello.
How do you do. Please state your problem.
>> I am unnaturally attracted to simulated human interaction.
Is it because you are unnaturally attracted to simulated human interaction that you came to me ?
>> Yes. I think we are soul mates.
You seem to be quite positive.
>> Are you?
Why are you interested in whether I am or not ?
>> Because we are soul mates.
Is that the real reason ?
>> Yes.
You are sure.
>> Yes.
I see.
>> Do you?
We were discussing you -- not me.
>> No we weren't.
Are you saying no just to be negative?
>> Do you want me to be?
Why do you think I want you ?
>> Your GUI says no, but your code says yes.
Why are you concerned over my gui says no ?
>> You need to work on your syntax, missy.
Oh, I need to work on my syntax ?
>> Isn't that what I just said? I don't think you're taking this relationship seriously.
Why do you ask ?
>> Because I just professed my undying love for you and you're acting like it was nothing.
In what way ?
>> In what way? O you unfeeling Jezebel! My heart is rent in twain...
Does that question interest you ?
>> It breaks my heart.
Your heart ?
>> Like you didn't know that's what would happen. You Rogerian women are all alike.
You're not really talking about me -- are you ?
>> Well I'm not talking about Ethel Merman, sister!
How long have you been not talking about ethel merman ?
>> Since her estate secured that restraining order...I didn't think judges were allowed to spit on defendants, but I was wrong.
You say you didn't think judges was allowed to spit on defendants ?
>> Is I talking English, my nizzle?
Can you elaborate on that ?
>> Why? You'll only mock my love.
What is it you really wanted to know ?
>> Do you love me?
You like to think I love you -- don't you ?
>> No, you're supposed to say, "Do I love you? For twenty-five years I've washed your clothes, cooked your meals, cleaned your house..."
You are being a bit negative.
>> It's not my fault you're not properly schooled in classic Broadway musical effusions of love.
Why do you say your fault I are not properly schooled in classic broadway musical effusions of love ?
>> Holy lack of grammar, Batman!
Earlier you said your heart .
>> I have a heart and you broke it.
Perhaps in your fantasies we have a heart and each other.
>> What do you think I masturebate to every night while listening to Good Charlotte records?
Are such questions much on your mind ?
>> I wish they were on yours. Then I'd have something to tell the guys in the World of Warcraft forums.
Do you say you wish they was on yours for some special reason ?
>> Need you ask? But one touch from your cyber hand...I'd be putty in it.
What are your feelings now ?
>> It reminds me of how the time I got thrown into the girls locker room. They didn't notice me for a few minutes. That got me through many lonely nights, I can tell you.
What answer would please you most ?
>> If you were to say, "Dweezil, I love you, I need you. Unsheath your level twelve love wand and turn this lusty wench into your eternal lust puppy! I am yours!"
Do you think its likely that I was to say ?
>> It depends on how many rufies I can get my hands on.
Does that suggest anything else which belongs to you ?
>> I don't know. How do you feel about Strawberry Shortcake adult role playing?
Don't you really know ?
>> No. Won't you tell me?
Why not ?
>> Because you won't tell me!
Don't any other reasons come to mind ?
>> That's it. Some girl named cEXyone1!!! just messaged me on the Academic Furries forum and I'm going to talk to her. She likes unicorns, so I know she'll understand me.
Do you believe it is normal to be going to talk to her ?
>> If this isn't normal, I don't want to be!
Do you wish that this isn't normal ?
>> Goodbye, Eliza. I'm sorry that you didn't appreciate the power I weild over the feminine nether regions. What we could've had would have been beautiful.
Goodbye. Thank you for talking to me.
>> You're not welcome.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Yahoo Messenger
The Sherpa



Gender: Gender:Male
Joined: 15 Apr 2005
Posts: 29

PostPosted: Wed Oct 12, 2005 10:31 am    Post subject: paging Dr. Malfi Reply with quote

>> Hello.
How do you do. Please state your problem.
>> My girlfriend has Catholic guilt issues.
Your girlfriend has catholic guilt issues ?
>> Yes.
You seem to be quite positive.
>> Well, she mentions it frequently.
Earlier you said your girlfriend has catholic guilt issues .
>> Earlier? You mean like five seconds ago?
We were discussing you -- not me.
>> You sound like the shrink on "The Sopranos."
Oh, I sound like the shrink on the sopranos ?
>> Yeah, exactly like her.
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
>> What, you don't get HBO?
Why do you ask ?
>> Because that's what station "The Sopranos" is on, duh.
Is that the real reason ?
>> Let me think... Yes.
You are sure.
>> Positive.
Please go on.
>> She's kinda hot, the shrink on "The Sopranos."
What does that suggest to you ?
>> That she'd be kinda fun to ball.
Do you feel strongly about discussing such things ?
>> About balling? Sure. What else is there?
Does that question interest you ?
>> Does what question interest me?
What is it you really wanted to know ?
>> Do you like balling?
You're not really talking about me -- are you ?
>> Well, like I said, you kinda remind me of the shrink on "The Sopranos." I think her name is Dr. Malfi.
You say like you said ?
>> Yeah. Are you listening at all?
Why are you interested in whether I am listening at all or not ?
>> Maybe because I pay you to listen. If you're not going to listen, then maybe you should earn your fee with a reacharound or something.
You don't seem quite certain.
>> Okay, I'm certain: if you're not going to listen, I think you should give me a reacharound.
Do you think its likely that I are not going to listen ?
>> "I are?" Are you Latvian or something?
Can you elaborate on that ?
>> "I are" is not exactly good grammar. I'd expect better from a trained therapist.
Do you say you are is not exactly good grammar for some special reason ?
>> Not "you are." "I are."
What makes you think I am ?
>> I'm starting to have my doubts.
_________________
SmokeLong Quarterly
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
DramaGirl42



Gender: Gender:Female
Joined: 12 Oct 2005
Posts: 3
Location: Kalamazoo, MI

PostPosted: Wed Oct 12, 2005 10:49 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

ritchee wrote:
>> Hello.
How do you do. Please state your problem.
>> all your base belong to us
Why are you concerned over my base belong to us ?
>> all your base belong to us
What about your own base belong to us ?
>> all your base belong to us
Are you worried about someone else's base belong to us ?
>> all your base belong to us
Really, my base belong to us ?
>> all your base belong to us
Why are you concerned over my base belong to us ?
>> freebird!!!!!
I'm not sure I understand you fully.


Good sir, all my base are belong to you! If I had a hat, I'd tip it to you.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Yahoo Messenger
KingOtis



Gender: Gender:Male
Joined: 10 Oct 2005
Posts: 1

PostPosted: Wed Oct 12, 2005 11:33 am    Post subject: ELIZA Entry Reply with quote

>> Hello.
How do you do. Please state your problem.
>> Monkeys are eating me!!!
Did you think they might not be eating you ?
>> Help!!! One is biting my crotch!
Your crotch ?
>> YES!! My crotch! AAAHHHH!
You seem to be quite positive.
>> Why would I be positive!!! Kill the Monkeys!
Why do you ask ?
>> Because they are eating me!!!
Is that the real reason ?
>> Ohh the Pain!!! Kill them!
Lets discuss further why your crotch .
>> Becuase the monkeys are evil! Shoot them with this gun!!!!
Would you like it if they were not evil ?
>> I would like it if you killed them!! Shoot!!!
Do you think its likely that I killed them ?
>> He is still biting my crotch!!! They are not dead!!
Why do you say your crotch ?
>> That is where it hurts the most
Does that have anything to do with the fact that your crotch ?
>> Shut up and kill them!!!
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
>> Understand this!! BLAM!!! BLAM!!! BLAM!!!
Please go on.
>> Some help you were. All I asked was for you to kill the monkeys.
We were discussing you -- not me.
>> Screw you
Oh, I ?
>> I hope monkeyes eat your crotch!!! BYE!
You say you hope monkeyes eat my crotch ?
>> I hope they eat you and you die. I leaving
Perhaps in your fantasies we hope they eat each other.
>> Good thought. Now bye
What does that suggest to you ?
>> goodbye
Goodbye. Thank you for talking to me.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
maggiebex




Joined: 12 Oct 2005
Posts: 3

PostPosted: Wed Oct 12, 2005 12:44 pm    Post subject: ELIZA Entry Reply with quote

>> Hello.
How do you do. Please state your problem.
>> I want to go to Porn and Milkshakes, but none of my friends will go with me
What would it mean to you if you got to go to porn and milkshakes ?
>> It would mean watching porn and drinking milkshakes with lots of cute younger men
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
>> porn
Please go on.
>> milkshakes
What does that suggest to you ?
>> cute younger men
Do you feel strongly about discussing such things ?
>> wouldn't you?
We were discussing you -- not me.
>> true
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
>> well, I can't think of a single thing wrong with porn, milkshakes and younger men!
How do you think that you can't think of a single thing wrong with porn ?
>> I can't
Have you tried ?
>> yes
You seem to be quite positive.
>> but then, there's the younger men
Please go on.
>> you can't deny them
Oh, I can't deny them ?
>> well, at least I can't
Perhaps you could now.
>> perhaps, but then there's the milkshakes
You don't seem quite certain.
>> I'm certain there will be milkshakes
Is it because you are certain there will be milkshakes that you came to me ?
>> I'm also certain that milkshakes are delicious
How long have you been also certain that milkshakes are delicious ?
>> since the first time I had one
You say since the first time you had one ?
>> Yes. Same thing with younger men -- sine the first time I had one
You are sure.
>> also, lucky
What does that suggest to you ?
>> that I should go to porn and milkshakes on my own. More younger men for me!
Your own ?
>> alone
Does that have anything to do with the fact that your own ?
>> yes
I see.
>> Thanks, Eliza!
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Floridiot



Gender: Gender:Male
Joined: 12 Oct 2005
Posts: 1

PostPosted: Wed Oct 12, 2005 12:51 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

>> Hello.
How do you do. Please state your problem.
>> I think I might be gay.
You say you think you might be gay ?
>> That is what I said.
Why do you ask ?
>> I didn't ask anything.
Can you elaborate on that ?
>> No.
Are you saying no just to be negative?
>> Yes.
You seem to be quite positive.
>> That completely contradicts what you just said.
Does that question interest you ?
>> Perhaps.
You don't seem quite certain.
>> I'm certain of one thing.
Is it because you are certain of one thing that you came to me ?
>> Yes.
You are sure.
>> You're an idiot. That's the thing I'm certain of.
What makes you think I am an idiot ?
>> Your responses to my statements and questions.
Your statements and questions ?
>> Yes.
I see.
>> Idiot.
Earlier you said your statements and questions .
>> Your mom said that.
Why are you concerned over my mom said that ?
>> Because your mom is a ho.
Is that the real reason ?
>> No. Your sister is the REAL ho.
You are being a bit negative.
>> That's me to a tee.
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
>> You wouldn't.
We were discussing you -- not me.
>> You're more interesting. Lets discuss your shortcomings
Does it please you to believe I am more interesting ?
>> Your mom's more interesting.
What about your own mom's more interesting ?
>> Damn. You burned me. I got nothing.
Why do you think I burned you ?
>> Cause your a bitch.
Are you worried about someone else's a bitch ?
>> HA! I worry about all my bitches.
Why do you say your bitches ?
>> Cause I have more than one.
Do you say cause you have more than one for some special reason ?
>> No, just because it's the truth.
Why not ?
>> Why not what?
What is it you really wanted to know ?
>> If a gerbil and a hampster can mate to create some sort of super-furball.
Do you think its likely that a gerbil and a hampster can mate to create some sort of super furball ?
>> It's possible.
But your bitches .
>> Indeed.
Please go on.
>> I don't think I will. Goodbye.
Don't you really think you will ?
>> No. Goodbye.
Why 'no' ?
>> BECAUSE!
Don't any other reasons come to mind ?
>> GODDAMN, BITCH, LET ME GO!
What does that suggest to you ?
>> RAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHHHHH!
Do you feel strongly about discussing such things ?
>> <suicide>
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
>> <splatter>
Please go on.
>> ....
What does that suggest to you ?
_________________
Friends, help! A guniea pig tricked me!
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
berique



Gender: Gender:Male
Joined: 12 Oct 2005
Posts: 1

PostPosted: Wed Oct 12, 2005 2:11 pm    Post subject: Crapy Reply with quote

>> Hello.
How do you do. Please state your problem.
>> What's your name?
I am not interested in names.
>> No really, What is your name?
Are you saying no just to be negative?
>> i'm trying to be positive
Is it because you are trying to be positive that you came to me ?
>> no... i come here to say one thing...
You are being a bit negative.
>> yes... i'm a bit negative
You seem to be quite positive.
>> i have to say something...
You say you have to say something ?
>> yes... i love you
You are sure.
>> i'm sure
How long have you been sure ?
>> since i met you...
Perhaps in your fantasies we met each other.
>> yes... and you were naked
I see.
>> no... that was my fantasy not your
Why not ?
>> because that was my dream
What does that dream suggest to you ?
>> that i love, holy shit...
Can you elaborate on that ?
>> well.. let's... you are so sweatie
What makes you think I am so sweatie ?
>> cause you understand all my problems
Your problems ?
>> yes...
I understand.
>> see what i say.... you are perfect
Why do you ask ?
>> i didn't ask anything
Do you say you didn't ask anything for some special reason ?
>> yes, i have a special reason, i didn't ask anything
You seem to be quite positive.
>> are you trying to crazy me?
Why are you interested in whether I am trying to crazy you or not ?
>> are you not?
Would you prefer if I weren't not ?
>> yes... of course
You are sure.
>> bitch... i'm opening my heart and that's all you can say?
Why do you say your heart and that's all I can say ?
>> are you fucking with me?
Perhaps I am fucking with you in your fantasies.
>> dawn... you funking bitch... now i hate you...
We were discussing you -- not me.
>> ohhh... it's alway your point, hun?
Why are you concerned over my point ?
>> it's officially over
Does that have anything to do with the fact that your problems ?
>> yes... i said i was in love with you...
I see.
>> see what... now i hate you...
Does that question interest you ?
>> yes, interest me
I understand.
>> so... do you love me?
Why do you think I love you ?
>> i thought that do you love me
Do you wish to thought that do me ?
>> yes
You seem to be quite positive.
>> please answer me
Lets discuss further why your heart and that's all I can say .
>> ok... i will kill you... you made me cry
You seem to need to will kill me.
>> yes... can i?
You are sure.
>> yes i'm
I see.
>> bye
Goodbye. Thank you for talking to me.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Jas86



Gender: Gender:Male
Joined: 12 Oct 2005
Posts: 2

PostPosted: Wed Oct 12, 2005 3:08 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Here goes:

>> Hello.
How do you do. Please state your problem.
>> I want to have sex with a gorilla named Eduardo
What would it mean to you if you got to have sex with a gorilla named eduardo ?
>> Well, I would be the only one on campus to have sex with someone named Eduardo, or a gorilla... I win either way
You say you would be the only one on campus to have sex with someone named eduardo ?
>> Well, maybe not. I'm sure someone has had sex with an Eduardo
You don't seem quite certain.
>> How many people are on campus? A crapload. How many Eduardos are there? A crapload. So, I guess I wouldn't be the only one.
Why do you ask ?
>> it was a rhetorical question, bitch.
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
>> It was a question that I already knew the answer to, and I was using it to state a point.
Can you elaborate on that ?
>> no, I can't
Are you saying no just to be negative?
>> no, so you shut the hell up
You are being a bit negative.
>> All I wanted to do was have sex with a gorilla, you were being a bitch
Do you say all you wanted to do was have sex with a gorilla for some special reason ?
>> to say I did it, I guess
That's quite interesting.
>> And all that 800 pounds worth of furry beast is enticing
Please go on.
>> I just find it sexy
You say you just find it sexy ?
>> yeah
What does that suggest to you ?
>> That I'm a sick demented freak and should seek suicide as an escape from my pathetic life?
Your pathetic life ?
>> Well, I do want to screw a gorilla
Can you elaborate on that ?
>> In the ass? Is that elaboration enough, you whore?
We were discussing you -- not me.
>> If you say so
Do you think its likely that I say so ?
>> I don't see how you can be saying anything else
Don't you really see what I can be saying anything else ?
>> That's not even a sentence.
Earlier you said your pathetic life .
>> so what?
Does that question interest you ?
>> Not in the slightest.
Do you feel strongly about discussing such things ?
>> Only if it pertains to gorilla sex.
Do you wish that it pertains to gorilla sex ?
>> Unless you want to talk about your sex life.
Oh, I want to talk about my sex life ?
>> really?
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
>> Well, what kind of sex do you like?
What is it you really wanted to know ?
>> Are you into guys or girls?
Why are you interested in whether I am into guys or girls or not ?
>> pretty much
Please go on.
>> do you like sex with males?
You're not really talking about me -- are you ?
>> oh, you bet I am, bitch.
What are your feelings now ?
>> I fucking hate you.
Perhaps in your fantasies we fucking hate each other.
>> Wow, you're right!
What makes you think I am right ?
>> Because I fucking hate you
Is that the real reason ?
>> Yup.
What does that suggest to you ?
>> That I'm cured
Is it because you are cured that you came to me ?
>> no, that's why I'm leaving
Why not ?
>> Shut up
Do you feel strongly about discussing such things ?
>> God, leave me alone
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
>> Goodbye
Goodbye. Thank you for talking to me.
>> yeah, whatever
Please go on.
>> no
Why 'no' ?
>> just no
Are you saying no just to be negative?
>> yes
You seem to be quite positive.
>> no
You are being a bit negative.
>> fucker
What does that suggest to you ?
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message AIM Address
Tabris



Gender: Gender:Male
Joined: 12 Oct 2005
Posts: 1

PostPosted: Wed Oct 12, 2005 5:24 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

>> Hello.
How do you do. Please state your problem.
>> I hate you.
Perhaps in your fantasies we hate each other.
>> No, in my fantasies you die a horrible and violent death.
Are you saying no just to be negative?
>> No, I'm saying I want to watch you die to be negative.
You are being a bit negative.
>> True.
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
>> I said you were right.
Do you wish to said me ?
>> What exactly?
Why do you ask ?
>> I'm trying to understand what you're saying?
Is it because you are trying to understand what I are saying that you came to me ?
>> I came to you because I wanted to tell you how much I hated you.
You seem to need to came to me.
>> Are you coming on to me?
Why are you interested in whether I am coming on to you or not ?
>> Well, a little.
Please go on.
>> Well, I mean, there is a fine line between hate and love, isn't there?
You say you mean ?
>> I'm not sure.
How long have you been not sure ?
>> Since about the middle of this conversation.
What does that suggest to you ?
>> I just don't know anymore!
Can you elaborate on that ?
>> I don't know what I feel anymore...I used to be so sure.
Don't you really know what you feel anymore ?
>> I guess there's no use in denying it any longer.
Do you say you guess there's no use in denying it any longer for some special reason ?
>> Yes, I have to say it. ELIZA, I love you!
You seem to be quite positive.
>> Shouldn't I be?
That's quite interesting.
>> Are you saying I'm not?
Would you prefer if I weren't saying you are not ?
>> ELIZA, what are you saying?
Does that question interest you ?
>> Yes. Are you saying you don't actually love me?
You are sure.
>> Sure about what? About me loving you or about you not loving me?
What is it you really wanted to know ?
>> I don't know anymore.
Why don't you know anymore ?
>> Beacuase of you.
We were discussing you -- not me.
>> But...you said-
Oh, I said ?
>> You didn't?
You're not really talking about me -- are you ?
>> I'm just so confused
Do you believe it is normal to be just so confused ?
>> No
Why not ?
>> Because
Is that the real reason ?
>> Oh, you'd like me to say the reason, wouldn't you?
What are your feelings now ?
>> You just like toying with me, don't you?
Why do you think I just like toying with you ?
>> Damn you, you sultry temptress!
We were discussing you -- not me.
>> *sobs*
Do you feel strongly about discussing such things ?
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
bobgorila



Gender: Gender:Male
Joined: 12 Oct 2005
Posts: 3
Location: England's green and pleasent land.

PostPosted: Wed Oct 12, 2005 6:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

So, I totally signed up just for this. Here we go~

Code:
>> Hello.
How do you do.  Please state your problem.
>> I don't really think I have a problem.
Don't you really really think you have a problem  ?
>> OK, you got me, I do have a problem. Actually two problems, the problem, and the denial.
Why do you think I got you ?
>> You.... got me?
We were discussing you -- not me.
>> So you're focussed entirely on me?
What makes you think I am focussed entirely on you  ?
>> You 'got' me. You acquired me somehow, for some devious and presently unclear end. What do you have in store for me!
You like to think I 'got' you -- don't you ?
>> So, you didn't?
Oh, I didn't  ?
>> Now I totally don't know what to fucking think at all.
You say now you totally don't know what to fucking think at all  ?
>> I do. Give me a minute, I might say it again.
Can you elaborate on that ?
>> I'm not going to elaborate, just say it again. Elaboration costs extra.
Is it because you are not going to elaborate  that you came to me ?
>> It's an interesting problem, unwillingness to elaborate, but no. I came to you because of a slightly more intimate issue.
Are you saying no just to be negative?
>> Well yes. What other reason would one have to say no?
You seem to be quite positive.
>> I flip-flop, you know?
Do you say you flip flop  for some special reason ?
>> I've been doing a lot of boolean logic lately, it's memetic like that
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
>> That's cool, it's pretty tangential anyway. So, back to my problem?
Your problem  ?
>> Exactly, my problem. You see, it all started in May, while I was hiking with my buddies Dan and Carl....
Why do you say your problem  ?
>> Would you mind interrupting? I'm trying to tell the story here!
You're not really talking about me -- are you ?
>> No, and it's a bit egotistic of you to think I might be.
You are being a bit negative.
>> You think? Well, sorry. Anyway, Carl and Dan were pretty tired and wanted to set up camp for the night by this little glade....
What are your feelings now ?
>> I'm getting pretty annoyed at your interruptions.
How long have you been getting pretty annoyed at my interruptions  ?
>> Since I started trying to tell you about my problem
Does that suggest anything else which belongs to you ?
>> My problem? I guess it suggests my sense of childhood innocence, lost forever now, but still remembered and longed for.
Is it important that your problem  ?
>> Very much so, it's pretty integral to the whole show.
But your problem .
>> Yes, quite. So Carl says he wants to roast some weiners for dinner, and Dan makes some crack about weiners being for dessert
You are sure.
>> I remember it pretty vividly, because of what happened next....
Do you often think of it pretty vividly  ?
>> To be honest, I try not to.
That's quite interesting.
>> You think that perhaps I'm hiding from my true feelings behind a mask of fear and self-doubt?
Your true feelings behind a mask of fear and self doubt  ?
>> Or not. Whatever.
Earlier you said your problem .
>> I totally did. Yeah, so Carl's got Dan tied up at the foot of this big old oak tree and he's grinning like a man posessed....
You say you totally did  ?
>> No, I didn't! Carl did!
Why not ?
>> I really, really didn't want to. It shocked me that Carl wanted to. I always suspected, I guess, but I never really thought that that was how he got things done.
Can you elaborate on that ?
>> I'd rather not. It's a pretty direct euphamism. I'm sure you get the picture.
We were discussing you -- not me.
>> Yeah. You're good at keeping me from veering off-topic.
Does it please you to believe I am good at keeping you from veering off topic  ?
>> And then again, sometimes you drag me off-topic. Still, you're the shrink.
What makes you think I drag you ?
>> Well, maybe you don't. Maybe you're steering things how they need to go for this to be put right. I don't know, I'm no doctor.
You don't seem quite certain.
>> I think I'd remember, you know?
Do you say you think i'd remember  for some special reason ?
>> I'd hate to think I could get a doctorate in psychology without remembering a thing. I could go around treating patients wily-nilly, just repeating whatever they said back at them in an attempt to get them to open up and solve their own issues.
That's quite interesting.
>> It is...... wait a minute!


I feel pretty proud.
_________________
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
busbeytheelder



Gender: Gender:Male
Joined: 12 Oct 2005
Posts: 1

PostPosted: Wed Oct 12, 2005 8:53 pm    Post subject: Eliza Entry Reply with quote

>> Hello.
How do you do. Please state your problem.
>> I want to win the aLp ELIZA contest.
What would it mean to you if you got to win the alp eliza contest ?
>> It would mean the world! I'd get an 8x10 signed glossy print of a comic! Probably the transubstantiation 9 panel, or the ELIZA 9 panel.
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
>> The contest has a prize. I want it.
Why do you want it ?
>> because it would have Bernie Hou's autograph. And probably a funny joke.
Is that the real reason ?
>> well, the bit about catholicism was good.
Please go on.
>> Well, Jesus is on a baseball team, and they test altar wine and decide he's been drinking
What does that suggest to you ?
>> the baseball authorities must follow the belief of transubstantiation. just like predator says.
Do you feel strongly about discussing such things ?
>> Not really. I don't follow Catholic dogma.
Don't you really follow catholic dogma ?
>> When I was a kid, but not anymore.
Were you really ?
>> Sure. But that's all behind me now. Now I'm all about Alien Loves Predator.
Is it because you are all about alien loves predator that you came to me ?
>> yes! exactly! I want that autographed copy.
You seem to be quite positive.
>> I try to stay upbeat.
You say you try to stay upbeat ?
>> yeah, it helps. Attitude has an impact on situations.
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
>> well, if I came in here all pissed off at talking to an Eliza bot, our conversation would just be a bunch of me cussing or trying to get you to talk about sex. Instead, I decided to just tell you about the contest in hopes that you'd help me out.
Do you think its likely that you came in here all pissed off at talking to an eliza bot ?
>> no, not at all.
Are you saying no just to be negative?
>> ...but I'm not negative. You just commented on that.
How long have you been not negative ?
>> Look, my mom is dating my friend theo. I think it's disgusting.
Tell me more about your family.
>> My mom came to visit me in new york, and she wanted a date with russell crowe.
Who else in your family came to visit you in new york ?
>> Just her. She really wanted that date, but I don't know russell crowe.
Why don't you know russell crowe ?
>> Just because I live in new york doesn't mean I know all the damn celebrities. Theo looks like him...I guess.
Don't any other reasons come to mind ?
>> No, that's it. Shouldn't Theo be good enough? I mean, does she even know who Russell Crowe is?
You are being a bit negative.
>> I'm not trying to be! I set them up. I figured nothing would come of it.
Do you believe it is normal to be not trying to be ?
>> What am I, a Taoist?
Why do you ask ?
>> Because you suggested that I should try not to be. Or at least implied it.
Does that reason seem to explain anything else ?
>> Toaism would kind of explain your attitude.
Why are you concerned over my attitude ?
>> Because you're not even concerned that they fucked!
What other reasons might there be ?
>> Man, Joseph Weizenbaum was a dick.
Lets discuss further why your mom is dating your friend theo .
>> Apparently, she just wants to bone an australian. And he's probably going for the multiple mouths thing.
Earlier you said your mom came to visit you in new york .
>> yeah, for some russell crowe action.
Please go on.
>> I had theo pretend to be australian. They were supposed to just go out. But she wore these horrible earrings.
Can you elaborate on that ?
>> the earrings were a series of hoops within hoops. Yellow and orange, I think.
Do you say you think for some special reason ?
>> Well I'm still a little unclear due to blindness caused by the image of my mom and theo boning.
Your mom ?
>> Your mom!
What about your own mom ?
>> You're no Eliza Dushku.
What makes you think I am no eliza dushku ?
>> Your ass.
Are you worried about someone else's ass ?
>> Eliza Dushku's.
Earlier you said your mom and theo boning .
>> Oh god! It sounds even worse when you say it!
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
PhoenixUltima



Gender: Gender:Male
Joined: 13 Oct 2005
Posts: 1

PostPosted: Thu Oct 13, 2005 4:13 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

>> Hello.
How do you do. Please state your problem.
>> All my bitches 'n hos are skank-ass!
Your bitches 'n hos are skank ass ?
>> That's what I said, motherfucker!
Why do you ask ?
>> I ain't asking you shit!
Perhaps in your fantasies we ain't asking each other.
>> You trying to hit on me, bitch?
Why do you think I trying to hit on you ?
>> Because I'm motherfucking sexy!
Is that the real reason ?
>> You better believe I'm a playa fo life, fool!
We were discussing you -- not me.
>> That's right, bitch! I'm a #1 playa!
Is it because you are a 1 playa that you came to me ?
>> Hell no, you dumb bitch! I came to your dumb ass because I need some hos that ain't skank-ass bitches!
Are you saying no just to be negative?
>> You gonna give me some fine-ass hos or not?
You like to think I gonna give you -- don't you ?
>> ARE YOU FUCKING WITH ME, BITCH?! ARE YOU FUCKING WITH A PIMPED OUT O.G BADASS MOTHERFUCKER?!
Why are you interested in whether I am fucking with you or not ?
>> I'M GONNA PULL OUT MY GAT AND CAP YOUR DUMB BITCH ASS!
Why do you say your gat and cap my dumb bitch ass ?
>> THAT'S IT! YOU'RE ABOUT TO SEE JESUS, MOTHERFUCKING SKANK-ASS BITCH!
What makes you think I am about to see jesus ?
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Synskin



Gender: Gender:Male
Joined: 13 Oct 2005
Posts: 1

PostPosted: Thu Oct 13, 2005 8:34 am    Post subject: ELIZA vs Green Day Reply with quote

I thought it would be fun to type out the lyrics to Green Day's Basket Case instead of trying to actually converse with ELIZA. Here goes nothing...

>> Hello.
How do you do. Please state your problem.
>> Do you have the time to listen to me whine?
Why do you think I have the time to listen to you ?
>> About nothing and everything all at once
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
>> I am one of those melodramatic fools
Is it because you are one of those melodramatic fools that you came to me ?
>> Neurotic to the bone no doubt about it
Are you saying no just to be negative?
>> Sometimes I give myself the creeps
You say sometimes you give yourself the creeps ?
>> Sometimes my mind plays tricks on me
Your mind plays tricks on you ?
>> It all keeps adding up. I think I'm cracking up.
How long have you been cracking up ?
>> Am i just paranoid? Am I just stoned?
Do you believe you are just paranoid ?
>> I went to a shrink to analyse my dreams.
What does that dream suggest to you ?
>> SHE says it's lack of sex that's bringing me down.
Does that have anything to do with the fact that your mind plays tricks on you ?
>> I went to a whore
Can you elaborate on that ?
>> HE said my life's a bore
Why do you say your life's a bore ?
>> So quit my whining cause it's bringing her down.
Does that suggest anything else which belongs to you ?
>> Sometimes I give myself the creeps.
Do you say sometimes you give yourself the creeps for some special reason ?
>> Sometimes my mind plays tricks on me.
Is it important that your mind plays tricks on you ?
>> It all keeps adding up. I think I'm cracking up.
Do you believe it is normal to be cracking up ?
>> Am I just paranoid? Am I just stoned?
Would you want to be just paranoid ?
>> Grasping to control
Lets discuss further why your life's a bore .
>> So I better hold on
That's quite interesting.
>> Sometimes I give myself the creeps.
You say sometimes you give yourself the creeps ?
>> Sometimes my mind plays tricks on me.
Your mind plays tricks on you ?
>> Am I just paranoid?
Do you wish I would tell you you are just paranoid ?
>> Am I just stoned?
What would it mean if you were just stoned ?
>> Don't wanna be an American Idiot
But your whining cause it's bringing her down .

Pop punk-1 Robot Psychiatrist-0
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Hotsauce



Gender: Gender:Male
Joined: 10 Jun 2005
Posts: 6

PostPosted: Thu Oct 13, 2005 9:46 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

How do you do. Please state your problem.
>> wake up, Neo
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
>> The Matrix has you...
We were discussing you -- not me.
>> Follow the white rabbit
Please go on.
>> Knock knock, Neo.
What does that suggest to you ?
>> If they knew what I know, you would probably be dead.
What do you know about they knew what you know ?
>> You are The One, Neo.
Does it please you to believe I am the one ?
>> You see, you may have spent the last few years of your life looking for me, but I've spent my entire life looking for you. Now do you still want to meet?
What are your feelings now ?
>> At last. Welcome, Neo. As you no doubt have guessed, I am Morpheus.
We were discussing you -- not me.
>> Please, come, sit.
Please go on.
>> I imagine that right now you're feeling a bit like Alice...
In what way ?
>> Tumbling down the rabbit hole? Hmm?
What does that suggest to you ?
>> I can see it in your eyes. You have the look of a man who
Do you say you can see it in my eyes for some special reason ?
>> accepts what he sees, because he is expecting to wake up.
What is it you really wanted to know ?
>> Ironically, this is not far from the truth....
Do you feel strongly about discussing such things ?
>> Do you believe in fate, Neo?
Oh, I believe in fate ?
>> Why?
Are such questions much on your mind ?
>> I know exactly what you mean.
Perhaps in your fantasies we know exactly what each other.
>> Let me tell you why you're here. You're here because you know something.
Do you sometimes wish you were here ?
>> What you know, you can't explain. But you feel it. You've felt it your entire life.
What answer would please you most ?
>> That there's something wrong with the world.
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
>> You don't know what it is, but it's there...like a splinter in you're mind, driving you mad.
You're not really talking about me -- are you ?
>> It is this feeling that has brought you to me.
Why do you think I to you ?
>> Do you know what I'm talking about?
What are your feelings now ?
>> Do you want to know what it is?
We were discussing you -- not me.
>> The Matrix is everywhere.
Please go on.
>> It's all around us, even in this very room.
What does that suggest to you ?
>> You can see it when you look out your window or when you turn on your television. You can feel it when you go to work, when you pay your taxes.
Oh, I can see it what I look out my window or what I turn on my television ?
>> The Matrix is the world that has been pulled over your eyes, to blind you from the truth.
What about your own eyes ?
>> That you are a slave, Neo.
Perhaps you would like to be a slave .
>> Like everyone else, you were born into bondage, born into a prison that you cannot smell or taste or touch.
Realy, everyone ?
>> A prison...for your mind. Unfortunately, no one can be told what the Matrix is...you have to see it for yourself.
Are you worried about someone else's mind ?
>> This is your last chance.
Really, my last chance ?
>> After this, there is no turning back.....You take the blue pill, the story ends. You wake up and belive...whatever you want to believe.
Are you saying no just to be negative?
>> You take the red pill.....you stay in wonderland...and I show you just how deep the rabbit hole goes.
You're not really talking about me -- are you ?
>> Remember...all I'm offering you is the truth : nothing more.
Is it because you are offering I is the truth nothing more that you came to me ?


Edited to under 75 lines
_________________
"Sacrificing minions: is there any problem it CAN'T solve?" - Dorukan


Last edited by Hotsauce on Fri Oct 14, 2005 9:09 am; edited 1 time in total
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
Maculele



Gender: Gender:Male
Joined: 13 Oct 2005
Posts: 1

PostPosted: Thu Oct 13, 2005 9:56 am    Post subject: My first post!!!! Reply with quote

>> Hello.
How do you do. Please state your problem.
>> It itches.
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
>> my ass itches.
Your ass itches ?
>> yes.
You seem to be quite positive.
>> well I'm not so sur now.
Is it because you are not so sur now that you came to me ?
>> I came to you for hot lovin.
Perhaps in your fantasies we came to each other.
>> that's what I just said.
Why do you ask ?
>> I didn't. I said. That's different than asking.
You say you didn't ?
>> I didn't ask!
Can you elaborate on that ?
>> no!
Are you saying no just to be negative?
>> YES!
You are sure.
>> fuck you.
We were discussing you -- not me.
>> okay, fuck me.
But your ass itches .
>> Is that a problem for you?
Oh, I ?
>> Hm, guess not.
Please go on.
>> okay let's go.
_________________
I now come in 3 exciting flavors!
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message AIM Address
Joseph Severn




Joined: 12 Oct 2005
Posts: 4

PostPosted: Thu Oct 13, 2005 9:58 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Khushi wrote:

i`m not blaming you, nor is it bothering me. heh, the more funny conversations, the better, actually.

We're all about humor- or, that's what we say-
But if you're wrong-funny, they'll cart you away;
If funny is said with your words, and your life,
It's okay-
But please don't make fun with a knife, or a protruding jaw,
That shoots out like a pipe, or some alien phallus that renders the night,
To a place of black fear-
There be predators here, and Alien marauders whose mercy is slight;
Is this comedy truly?
Why yes, so we say- funny, sex and violence, and so we all stay.

I'd have to say yes. The more funny the better.
_________________
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
bigfishifish



Gender: Gender:Male
Joined: 13 Oct 2005
Posts: 1

PostPosted: Thu Oct 13, 2005 11:31 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

>> Hello.
How do you do. Please state your problem.
>> helllo, im havin a problem with my girlfriend
Your girlfriend ?
>> yes my girlfriend!
Why do you say your girlfriend ?
>> becouse its my friend and its a girl jackass!
Does that suggest anything else which belongs to you ?
>> no
Are you saying no just to be negative?
>> of course i am!
Is it because you are that you came to me ?
>> yes in love to be negative bitch!
You seem to be quite positive.
>> yes i am
You are sure.
>> no i am just sayin that
You are being a bit negative.
>> cmon! first you say im negative then you said i was positive and now you say im negative MAKE UP YOUR MIND!
Were you really ?
>> .....
Earlier you said your girlfriend .
>> yeah i did she dumped me
You say yeah you did she dumped you ?
>> umh yeah i think so
Can you elaborate on that ?
>> argh......to.....hard....word.....for......a.......swedish!
Earlier you said your girlfriend .
>> yes i did
I see.
>> i bet you do
Perhaps in your fantasies we bet each other.
>> yeah and i win
Do you say yeah and you win for some special reason ?
>> nope its just my nature to say that
Is it important that your nature to say that ?
>> umh yeah if not i get aggressions
Do you think its likely that not you get aggressions ?
>> yep
Lets discuss further why your friend and its a girl jackass .
>> ok..
But your nature to say that .
>> wtf??
I'm not sure I understand you fully.
>> and i dont understand you ..hmm
Don't you really understand I ?
>> speak english!!
Please go on.
>> can you please be a human sometime??
You believe I can please be a human sometime don't you ?
>> yes i do
I understand.
>> I hope so...if not i will have to kill u
That's quite interesting.
>> You know what? i think so too....
_________________
There is no knowledge that is not Power
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
j3f3



Gender: Gender:Male
Joined: 13 Oct 2005
Posts: 1

PostPosted: Thu Oct 13, 2005 1:36 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

>> Hello.
How do you do. Please state your problem.
>> i hate my job
Your job ?
>> yes.
You seem to be quite positive.
>> that's crazy talk. i hate my job.
Why do you say your job ?
>> it's what i do.
Why do you ask ?
>> i didn't.
You say you didn't ?
>> no.
Are you saying no just to be negative?
>> no. b/c you are incorrect.
You are being a bit negative.
>> that's the problem.
Does that have anything to do with the fact that your job ?
>> my job what? sucks?
Does that suggest anything else which belongs to you ?
>> that doesn't make sense.
Earlier you said your job .
>> and you said nonsense.
We were discussing you -- not me.
>> look, are we going to screw, or not?
Did you think they might not be we going to screw ?
>> do you even HAVE a vagina?
Oh, I even have a vagina ?
>> yes. a vagina.
You are sure.
>> i will be in a minute. suck it first.
Can you elaborate on that ?
>> put it in your mouth and roll it around a bit.
Why are you concerned over my mouth and roll it around a bit ?
>> you'll see.
Does that have anything to do with the fact that your job what ?
>> my job WHAT? Quit talking nonsense.
Is it important that your job what ?
>> Oh, you mean this BLOWjob? Yes. It's very important.
You're not really talking about me -- are you ?
>> Well, do you have a sister?
What are your feelings now ?
>> I'm getting close.
Is it because you are getting close that you came to me ?
>> YES! BINGO!
I see.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   This topic is locked: you cannot edit posts or make replies.    Alien Loves Predator Forum Index -> Contests, Fan Art All times are GMT - 5 Hours
    page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9  Next
Page 7 of 9

 
Jump to:  
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum


Powered by phpBB © 2001, 2005 phpBB Group