January 28, 2005 at 3:30 am

I am not ticklish. I do not know the joy of tickling.

January 28, 2005 at 4:10 am

It’s not so much joy as terror.

January 28, 2005 at 4:40 am

…with your eyes open, your eyeballs will fly out.
it’s true, my friend told me.

January 28, 2005 at 7:00 am

You definitely can. I have had incidents.

My mother also has a lot of these er, incidents. That’s what happens to your bladder control after 3 babies.

January 28, 2005 at 9:51 am

I’ve sneezed with my eyes open before, so I can still see the road while driving on highway. :roll:

January 28, 2005 at 10:56 am

Did you know that if you pee while being tickled and sneezing, you can loose a lot of friends?

Also, if you tickle someone who is peeing or pee on someone who is sneezing or pee your pants on the subway because you were dreaming of niagara falls because the idiot hipster-guy sitting next to you was listening to “relaxing rain forest sounds” loudly on his ipod…um..where was I going with this again…oh yeah, you can loose a lot of friends. And gain some you may not want.

January 28, 2005 at 12:28 pm

Ha. Hey, if you have access to your friend while they’re sleeping, don’t forget to put their hand in a warm bucket of water. That’ll totally make them pee all over the joint.

Sneezing? Yeah, I knew I forgot 1 of the 2 factors. Oh well.

January 28, 2005 at 3:17 pm

keeping with the toilet humor…

why does the people that make toilet paper cut it into those itty bitty ‘sheets’?

Anyone ever use JUST ONE sheet of toilet paper for anything???

January 28, 2005 at 9:45 pm

I love this one! However, I can’t post it outside my office door (school regs., etc.). Any suggestions from the archive which would fit a nerd’s door and elevate the status of ALP to the university level??????

Help, anyone… :P

January 29, 2005 at 4:24 am

sarathine wrote:
You definitely can. I have had incidents.

My mother also has a lot of these er, incidents. [...]

Me, too. Kegel, Kegel, Kegel, is all I can say.

Do many lads have these incidents too?

January 29, 2005 at 5:08 am

What you mean is sneeze, and some pee involuntary comes out. When I meant was pee, and when you sneeze, keep the stream going interrupted.

linwand wrote:
I love this one! However, I can’t post it outside my office door (school regs., etc.). Any suggestions from the archive which would fit a nerd’s door and elevate the status of ALP to the university level??????

There’s no swearing in this one! This is as clean as yer gonna get, buddy.

I guess some people recently have been partial to Alien Vs. Boxflex:

January 29, 2005 at 8:28 am

Well, even if you can, you don’t want to… Bad things can happen.

January 29, 2005 at 5:16 pm

I miss boris and zeeve :(.

January 30, 2005 at 4:34 am

Nah, when you sneeze, the pubococcygous muscle contracts. The stream is temporarily interrupted, but that last little bit before the interruption tends to be forced out violently. This has happened to me before, but, luckily, I usually piss in a laundry sink. 8)

April 13, 2005 at 5:07 pm

I am here reading the archives, I LOVE the picture of Grand Central Terminal in the background. They are so civil.

January 19, 2007 at 8:29 am

I just put it to a test. I was peeing (yes, we girls to that sort of things) and I felt my nose tickling. I sneezed. IT IS PHYSICALLY POSSIBLE TO SNEEZE AND PEE at the same time. Though, unlike Abe I was sitting safely on a toilet seat. It didn’t stop the stream it just made it come faster for the sneezing time.

This was extreme science performed accidently.

January 19, 2007 at 8:53 am

TwistedAddiction wrote:
I just put it to a test.

Psst, it had happened to me several times already. I was "guest" two posts before you. Sadly, I no longer live in a house with a laundry sink.

January 19, 2007 at 3:05 pm

Laundry sink? From this on I’ll drink water from a bottle. But did you know Blaster that if you sneeze 8 times you will have orgasm? So what happens if you’re peeing and sneezing eight times? A mess?

January 19, 2007 at 3:06 pm

Bah, where did you hear that nonsense?

January 20, 2007 at 11:37 am

Learned it from a british document. It was about women who got too many orgasms. Some doctor said that it is possible to have an orgasm while sneezing because of the contraction of the muscels in the area. With normal healthy people it’ll take 8 sneezes. Whether it’s true or not I’m willing to believe it. Someone should make an experiment about it. Some white pepper and one sensitive nose. Any volunteers?

January 20, 2007 at 5:04 pm

Hm, I guess it might be possible, as there are hands-free masturbation (pardon the oxymoron) techniques which employ clenching and relaxing the pubococcygous, but eight sneezes doesn’t seem right. In any event, get right on that and get back to us with your results.

January 22, 2007 at 11:29 am

Possible reinterpretation: Eight sneezes cause, physiologically speaking, the same pelvic muscles to contract, the same number of times, as an orgasm. [Note: completely hypothetical, no hard data backing this up other than my guess.]

January 22, 2007 at 1:39 pm

I’ll be back when my study of female orgasm generated by using only white pepper is done. It may take time. First of all I need to be drunk enough to snif a white pepper, second of all, I need to be sober enough that I won’t screw the experiment. And third of all I need to sneeze eight times. I have way too much spare time.

May 23, 2007 at 8:03 pm

I just ask this — why the hell is Abe holding a mop in the last panel? Lmao.

May 24, 2007 at 5:49 am

If you sneeze while you pee, your aim might be off during the sneeze.

He’s getting a mop to clean up his piss.

May 26, 2007 at 4:25 pm

now, ask yourself… did you REALLY wanna know that?

[I'm back! Life goes on, Baby!]

September 10, 2009 at 4:04 am

Actually, it IS possible to tickle yourself. I do it by running my finger nail(s) over my stomach from left to right. It will kinda give you the feeling.

May 11, 2016 at 10:45 am


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