Comments

preston is my dad
June 6, 2005 at 9:12 am

but the rythym is so hard to follow…

Antidistinctlyminty
June 6, 2005 at 9:18 am

Damn fine work.

The graphical representation of the conversation meant I didn’t even have to read to enjoy the masterpiece.

Bernie, you are so in tune with your loyal slackers. I felt a little peaky today and wasn’t sure whether I’d be able to “read” your comic.

You made it so I didn’t have to.

Now, if only you could psychically beam the comics to us, so we wouldn’t have to turn on our computers and manipulate these pesky mouses…

Or, perhaps project them onto the night sky, Batman-stylie. Although, that would mean opening the curtains and looking upwards. Hmmm.

I’d be willing to do that, but I’m a fairly energetic slacker.

Cheers

Anti D.M.

Xeno.Morph
June 6, 2005 at 9:38 am

<((_CRAYON_(( )

Yes, this comic is certainly for the slackers. As well, it is for the slackers who also happen to be hypocrites. Ah, AntiDistinctly, you contradict yourself. You say that operating the mouse is much to demanding for someone like you, yet you click click click away on the keyboard. I do believe that the spontaneous movement of thy fingers is much harder than simply reading a comic. As well, you also have the occasional typeo where youa statr to speak like this in the forums, causing the sneed for the use of the bakcspacebutton/.

What the hell is that beside the game of Twister? Since Abe’s saying it, it must be something horrible.

Doctor What?
June 6, 2005 at 10:02 am

Quote:
What the hell is that beside the game of Twister? Since Abe’s saying it, it must be something horrible.

It’s a big can of whipped cream.
Preston being an extra-terrestrial, this would clearly would be something horrible, as the alien bacteria that live in the Predator intestine convert it into copious amounts of gas.

As for how it fits into a game of Twister, we are clearly meant to apply our own imagination….Mmmmm….creamy….

Antidistinctlyminty
June 6, 2005 at 10:13 am

Xeno.Morph wrote:

As well, you also have the occasional typeo where youa statr to speak like this in the forums, causing the sneed for the use of the bakcspacebutton/.

Holy moosejaw! I’m being repressed by the self-appointed forum typing police.

Slob-hand, lazy-fingers… call it what you will. I prefer the term “Freestylie-Typist”

Oh, and Xeno… the extra “i” in Freestyle was especially for you.

Antidistinctlyminty
June 6, 2005 at 10:22 am

Xeno.Morph wrote:

You say that operating the mouse is much to demanding for someone like you, yet you click click click away on the keyboard. I do believe that the spontaneous movement of thy fingers is much harder than simply reading a comic.

Bernie’s kindness and forethought spurred me into the unusual activity of typing. Lots.

Sorta like the people who take the time to vote “Don’t Know” on telephone polls.
It is the “I may be dumb, but my opinion should be heard” spirit that will never die!

Antidistinctlyminty
June 6, 2005 at 10:31 am

Xeno.Morph wrote:

Ah, AntiDistinctly, you contradict yourself. You say that operating the mouse is much to demanding for someone like you,

Ah, Xeno.Morph, you paraphrase me quite beautifully. However, I’d probably have said the mouse was too demanding. :wink:

Perhaps it is simply of the backspace key you appear to advocate so strongly? :P

hey, lookit me… I’m a closet pedant!!! :D

Wize
June 6, 2005 at 10:34 am

Ah yes Bern-coming with the goods again!

:lol:

Dahaka
June 6, 2005 at 10:58 am

Funny how you mention postponing your son’s inheritance on a comic involving jesus.

Getting a Haircut- Increasing your aerodynamicness

Winston_C
June 6, 2005 at 11:12 am

Heheh. Nice explanation. But actually, I know quite a few people who DO use this method.
Maybe it’s because the girls can’t/won’t take the pill and are allegic to rubber.

I have read a (clerically approved) book from the 19th century once that gave women advice how to move their hips during sexual intercourse in order to become pregnant. Quite fun to read. Most of all because it describes the whole thing as ‘a burden’ to the woman which she should be willing to take in order to fulfill her godgiven duty as a wife. Enjoying it was NOT an option.

desert_drum
June 6, 2005 at 12:09 pm

Winston_C wrote:
Most of all because it describes the whole thing as ‘a burden’ to the woman which she should be willing to take in order to fulfill her godgiven duty as a wife. Enjoying it was NOT an option.

Close your eyes and think of England :)

Funny, funny stuff – it’s been quite a week, and I needed the free smiles, so thank you, Bernie!

Digitaaliklosetti
June 6, 2005 at 12:27 pm

Slap me in punishment of my ignorance if you will, but I didn’t get the Rhythm Method thingie.

desert_drum
June 6, 2005 at 12:57 pm

Digitaaliklosetti wrote:
Slap me in punishment of my ignorance if you will, but I didn’t get the Rhythm Method thingie.

No slaps today :) The news section under the comic explains it well.

Uncle Whippity
June 6, 2005 at 1:15 pm

You know, I’m coming to appreciate Abe in a way I never thought I would.

While I wouldn’t want him to date my neice (we have enough odd aliens in my family…), it’s getting easier to identify with him.

Twister and whipped cream. Yum….

imrumpf
June 6, 2005 at 1:19 pm

don’t worry i didnt get it either…The pictures were funny enough but as far as telling a story…i was lost after the 2nd panel. Of course I loved the twister panel the best. It was stilll good but I am sure If i got the story 100% i’d love it even more :P

ChibiSpawn
June 6, 2005 at 2:30 pm

Wow that was great. I didnt know a comic without words could be that funny, Abe is just the best. Heh heh Twister and whipped cream eh? Hmmmm……

Munan
June 6, 2005 at 3:31 pm

Very funny, I love the way the conversation is represented here: it shows the true essence of each of the characters – Abe is such a jerk, but all men have at least one friend like that! For some situations you just need them.

My father, who studied medicine, has a collection of sex ed books written over the past century…

trust me, there’s weirder stuff in some of them than the “rythm method”… (which is indeed used by some acquaintances of mine, so all this “double dutch” doesn’t hold true for all the inhabitants of our little country). I remember one in which the woman-on-top-position was described as unhealthy an unnatural, given the instinctive submissive nature of women.

imrumpf
June 6, 2005 at 4:00 pm

This is for you, Digitaaliklosetti. It’s a very cheesy, crappy version with words so you can get the gist of it. No laughing please! :p

Yeah yeah i know I spelt Rhythm wrong…i’m just too lazy to fix it now…

Silverzero
June 6, 2005 at 5:36 pm

Haha, comic genius as usual. I love the whole “talking in pictures” thing. And Jesus suggesting The Rhythm Method… the single worst method of contraception in history.

Blaster
June 6, 2005 at 6:14 pm

VERY nice, B. And I almost never compliment you. It’s not that you don’t deserve it, it’s just that I would be echoing a dozen other people. But this one was especially inventive.
Grrr, I do not want to engage in a diatribe concerning the Catholic Church’s role in repressing healthy sexuality, so I will just try to enjoy the comic. :?

Holly Resurrected
June 6, 2005 at 6:48 pm

:lol: This is an instance where pictures really are worth a thousand words. Abe’s “handcuffs and whip” comment was way more lewd than anything he could have said regarding that. Great new comic.

Madge
June 6, 2005 at 7:30 pm

Because I know that it’s probably given I’ll say this:
BREASTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That out the way, awesome comic. I love the little pictures. They are cool.

I think it’s a great metaphor of how the modern Metrosexual is under so much pressure from his peers and from religion to conform to a society-met standard that may not be realistic for him.

That said, you’ve reminded me that my Catholic school is doing a seminar on natural family planning in a few weeks. I’m very scared. They tell horny teenagers not to bother with contraception because it’s “unreliable”. *insert more rant*

And you wonder why there’s so many STDs around :P

Gabby
June 6, 2005 at 8:23 pm

Good Lord!
I had no idea that naked twister was an obscure reference! And I thought [i]I[i] was sheltered!
Although I have no idea how you could work in the whipped cream without disrupting the flow of things.

Digitaaliklosetti
June 6, 2005 at 8:38 pm

imrumpf wrote:
This is for you, Digitaaliklosetti.

Ahh…thanks. Why?

Oshidori
June 6, 2005 at 9:46 pm

Haaaaaahahahahaha! Today’s comic is unbelievably awesome!

By the way, hi, it’s the first time I’m posting on this forum ::waves::

But anyway, yeah, it was *really* hard suppressing any eye rolling or giggling when my (now) husband and I had to sit throught the NFP portion of our Pre Cana. And, oddly enough, as soon as they told us they were then going into that segment of the program, the sky turned nearly pitch black and began to pour, complete with booming thunder and lightning. We took at as a sign that God thought it was totally stupid too.

That was definitely one of the hilights of an agonizing 7 hours of God talk.

Only surpassed by the 8-month old pregnant chick in stripper-wear that came in late with her fiance.

imrumpf
June 6, 2005 at 10:04 pm

Oh sorry…you said you didn’t get the Rhythm part…I accidently read it as the whole thing. Oh well I’m sure there are a few shy people out there that didn’t totally get it in some way and they are secretly thanking me….

PJ2POP
June 6, 2005 at 10:07 pm

……..funny, just funny. :lol: [/i]

General Grievous
June 6, 2005 at 10:39 pm

hAHAHAHASHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

KTinNYC
June 7, 2005 at 1:43 am

Re: NFP, aka “Fertility Awareness”:
Works pretty well for a lot of folks, including me. Also works to help couples get pregnant if that’s their goal- again, worked for me. Besides taking temperatures, it also involves checking cervical fluid and, for the truly diligent, cervical position.

Munan
June 7, 2005 at 3:00 am

Madge wrote:
That said, you’ve reminded me that my Catholic school is doing a seminar on natural family planning in a few weeks. I’m very scared. They tell horny teenagers not to bother with contraception because it’s “unreliable”.

THIS is worrying…

I remember the riot a few years ago, created by a bishop here in Holland when he suggested that distributing condoms in Africa to stop the spread of veneral diseases might just be not such a bad idea…

predator505
June 7, 2005 at 7:20 am

great comic! i love ALP!

hobo
June 7, 2005 at 7:44 am

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

pictures are so much better than words at this instance, couldn’t have told it bettererer. keep the creative juices flowing bernie. they’re in overdrive now…

Xeno.Morph
June 7, 2005 at 8:04 am

Eh…

Nifty Niftarius
June 7, 2005 at 10:26 am

Abstinence is ‘lunacy’???? Then why is that-

1) Uganda’s AIDS rate has dropped since they ditched the hand-out-condoms idea in favour of the lets-promote-abstinence-and-fidelity approach?
2) I don’t know any guy who’s got a girl they HAVEN’T had sex with pregnant?
3) Virgins generally don’t have STDs? (note to virgins: next time some tool asks you if you are a virgin, simply ask him/her if they’ve gotten rid of the Clap yet)

Frank_in_Brooklyn
June 7, 2005 at 11:07 am

Dude, I’m telling you, it works.
My wife used it for several months leading up to our wedding.
She charted daily and even had a palm pilot program that she could key it into. Right after we got married, she saw she was ovulating and 41 weeks later, we have a beautiful baby girl.

there are grey areas around the day of ovulation but once the woman figures out the signs, it’s relatively easy to follow.

Not saying it’s the best of protection.

I wouldn’t use it for protection sake but for fertility sake yes.

Winston_C
June 7, 2005 at 11:57 am

Nifty Niftarius wrote:
Abstinence is ‘lunacy’???? Then why is that-

1) Uganda’s AIDS rate has dropped since they ditched the hand-out-condoms idea in favour of the lets-promote-abstinence-and-fidelity approach?
2) I don’t know any guy who’s got a girl they HAVEN’T had sex with pregnant?
3) Virgins generally don’t have STDs? (note to virgins: next time some tool asks you if you are a virgin, simply ask him/her if they’ve gotten rid of the Clap yet)

Thus speaks one abstinent guy. :wink:

Xeno.Morph
June 7, 2005 at 1:40 pm

Winston, you gotten rid of your crabs yet?

Winston_C
June 7, 2005 at 8:06 pm

What?! *scratches*

Madge
June 7, 2005 at 8:23 pm

Nifty Niftarius wrote:
Abstinence is ‘lunacy’???? Then why is that-

1) Uganda’s AIDS rate has dropped since they ditched the hand-out-condoms idea in favour of the lets-promote-abstinence-and-fidelity approach?
2) I don’t know any guy who’s got a girl they HAVEN’T had sex with pregnant?
3) Virgins generally don’t have STDs? (note to virgins: next time some tool asks you if you are a virgin, simply ask him/her if they’ve gotten rid of the Clap yet)

I think Bernie was saying abstinance in the context of a married relationship, though no-one can ever be sure what Bernie means.

Cause, like, in the 1800s, the most effective method of contraception was seperate bedrooms.

And, really, if you’re married to someone, I think you’re entitled to have wild monkey sex all the time. Assuming it’s with your spouse. And there’s loyalty and junk.

Man I need sleep, why did I wake up so early? WHY????

Blaster
June 8, 2005 at 12:55 am

Winston_C wrote:
Thus speaks one abstinent guy. :wink:

Haha! Smooth.

And to the alarmist: Sure, abstinence works. And if I amputate my arm, I’ll never get tennis elbow. Needless to say, we must approach the issue realistically, and analyze it within the context of a cost-benefit dichotomy.
Anyway, if you want to be abstinent, feel free. But sex does not necessarily = death or pregnancy. We live with the modern marvels of medical science. :D

Xeno.Morph
June 8, 2005 at 7:56 am

So… What your trying to do is… influence teenagers to die or become pregnant by not being abstinate? It’s a one in four chance of having a baby every time. Those odds are… not worth it, really. Not if you want to have a stable life and a good education, though there are schools for teenage moms. And, I mean, OGFM!! You’re a GUY! You wouldn’t understand. If you guys want to not be abstinate, then don’t try to convince girls that sex is a good thing when unmarried. Go find one of the “other” girls, like from that movie The Longest Yard.

Winston_C
June 8, 2005 at 9:40 am

:shock:

If there’s really nothing in between remaining a virgin for the rest of my life and ending up with at least half a dozen veneral deseases, then the situation in the US must be REALLY bad. (this was sarcasm, okay?)

Marriage doesn’t prevent from catching e.g. AIDS. If you’re unfortunate enough, you can get it from an infected blood donor or, for that matter, from a cheating partner. So, better ditch marriage as well and enter a convent/monastery?

It’s a functional relationship where people don’t lie to each other that is important. And most of all – no double moral standards.

General Grievous
June 8, 2005 at 9:53 am

Screw Sunday Skool! God gave us sex! Contraception is Satan’s will!! :evil:

Xeno.Morph
June 8, 2005 at 11:11 am

There is an alternative to catching diseases and being a virgin for the rest of your life. Marry a guy who is willing to have a family, and is also a virgin. As well, blood screening is stopping diseases through transfers. And, I don’t think EVERYBODY has had a blood transfusion. Hell, you’re more likely to catch something from the tatoo parlour.

And what’s the big deal about being a virgin anyways?

Winston_C
June 8, 2005 at 12:31 pm

Well, nothing’s wrong with the private decision of not having any sexual intercourse. It’s just the attitude “Either you’re a virgin/a good married woman or you’re a slut” that I don’t agree with.

For example, I’m a vegetarian. It’s my own free decision to not eat meat, but
a) I don’t condemn people who eat meat
b) I don’t mind having lunch with people who eat meat
c) I don’t consider eating meat as something “wrong”, I just decided for myself to not eat it.
d) I don’t attempt to convert people into becoming vegetarians.

There’s a little difference.

Winston_C
June 8, 2005 at 12:33 pm

P.S. I have a tatoo! :P

sardine
June 8, 2005 at 1:23 pm

Lunacy??? No hypocracy!

Blaster wrote:
Needless to say, we must approach the issue realistically, and analyze it within the context of a cost-benefit dichotomy

That’s something I never get… why is that usually the conservative folks who oppose contraception and abortion are usually the same conservative folks who oppose social spending, welfare, childcare payments, et al etc. ? What do they think single moms are suppose to live on to get by?

Not trying to start a social-political debate, but I feel like that I’m often the only person who ever sees that paradox.

InvaderJess
June 8, 2005 at 2:43 pm

First and foremost, Xeno, it’s spelled tattoo. Thank you very much. I have one as well and the clinic I went to was very clean. The artist changed gloves, like ten times and everything was sealed and sterilized after opening.

Also, I beleive that anyone close-minded enough to think that you’re a slut just because you’re not a virgin or married should be drawn and quartered. As long as there’s open honesty and each individual is taking all necessary precautions, everything should be fine. Yes, there is that .01% chance left over, and sometimes contraceptives fail. But, most of the time if everybody is being a responsible adult, premartial sex is safe.

Remember kiddies, bag it and get screened regularly :wink:

Private Whore
June 8, 2005 at 3:59 pm

What the hell is wrong with sex before marriage?

desert_drum
June 8, 2005 at 4:15 pm

It always amazes me that even people who are rational about other things tend to turn this into a black-and-white issue, regardless of which side of the debate they fall on. What in hell’s wrong with teaching *all* of it?

Yeah, abstaining is 100% (or close to it – there are some weird ways to pick up diseases), and that in itself makes it worth discussion…but very few people abstain for 100% of their lives. And when they do go off that path (assuming they ever get *on* it), better they know that they can continue to protect themselves in other ways.

I come from a weird pocket in time when sex ed was still taught in middle school, under the guise of Health class; I have a memory that will probably be with me for life of the 5,000 year old mean-as-hell girls’ PE coach getting all the girls in the health classroom and announcing, “This is NOT sex education, so do NOT go home and tell your parents you had sex education. Now we’re going to discuss pregnancy and childbirth.” It was years before I understood how brave she really was to teach it at all.

It is possible to educate people on all these options without making a moral crusade or even a religious issue out of any one of them. Teach *how*, and let right and wrong be a matter for the individual and their own family, faith, etc. So far as I know, even the most strict “You will be eternally damned for using a condom” belief system won’t cast anyone into the fiery pit just for knowing how to put one on right.

Winston_C
June 8, 2005 at 5:35 pm

Well, that puts into proper words what I attempted to point out. But – you know – the language…

And I’m very embarrassed for misspelling “tattoo” as well. :oops:

Lylmik
June 8, 2005 at 11:16 pm

Aw come on guys….!!!
Premarital sex is fun!!!
If you are dumb enough to catch stuff, tough titties, if you know that guy/chick is a village bicycle(everyone had a ride), don’t touch with a electric cattleprod, simple as that. And seriously, if someone’s got something, doesn’t tell you, and you catch it, boiling oil and burial up to their neck in the middle of busy intersection is in order.
And let alone the stories i have heard….
“Hi!
My new bride and i never had sex before(religios types), and we now can’t because even though i’m not greatly endowed, my girlfriends’ plumbing is just too small….”
Etc etc, get the drift.
Response:
“Hi!
Go to the sex shop, and get a bunch of dildo’s, start from the thinnest, pencil sized and work your way up.
And what you do then is. start with the thinnest one, when open enough, use a bigger one….” What a fu==ing embarrasment, to say at least.
Realise it people, the bits are given to us for a reason, i have never seen a dolphin burning in hell(i think i have heard one of the few animals having pleasure, not just procreation sex). Don’t just do it, we are not our hippie parents, banging anything that’s there, but loosen up, people apparently flew to the moon, behave like it for screw’s sake!!! Have the whole thing!!! Love and everything else!!! It’s a beautiful thing, sharing such an intimate thing with someone else!!
Or in Case Study 2: (My favourite)
Not really sure what country, but i think Manilla/Taiwan/Something like that, most of the population is Muslim, (nothing against, my neighbours, 40% of them were of the same faith, great people!!)no sex ed whatsoever…
Anyway, couple couldn’t concieve, went to the doctors, did this test, that test, woman ovulating fine, guy not shooting duds…. All fine… Doctor’s stumped.
Anyway: (doc):”How many times per week, on average do you have sex/being intimate?”
Couple:”Sex/imtimate?”
PEOPLE, CRAWL OUT FROM UNDER YOUR ROCKS!!!!!
Look after yourself, respect others, don’t wreck stuff, if you find a sign saying “WORLD SELF-DESTRUCT BUTTON”, do not push the button, leave other people’s beliefs to them, and all will be fine.

InvaderJess
June 9, 2005 at 1:03 am

Winston_C wrote:
Well, that puts into proper words what I attempted to point out. But – you know – the language…

And I’m very embarrassed for misspelling “tattoo” as well. :oops:

No, I’m embarrassed. I thought you misspelled it on purpose to pick on Xeno. :lol:

Blaster
June 9, 2005 at 2:04 am

I hate to rain on your parade, Lymik, but that story about the couple not having sex is an urban (or international, or whatever) legend. Last time
I heard it, it was a German couple (go figure) and it even made the news!
Otherwise, I agree with what you say.

The problem that I often have with these groups that oppose premarital sex, is that they are simply disguising there morality as science. If you think that premarital sex is wrong, fine. You are entitled to your opinion, just 1) call it like it is; don’t try to disguise it, and 2) keep your morality out of my f-ing face!

And stop with the scare tactics already! We have something called the oral contraceptive pill. It is over 99.9% effective when used properly. And disease? Yes, you have to play it safe sometimes. Know your partner, use protection.

Sex is NOT a bad thing. Enjoy!

Blaster
June 9, 2005 at 2:05 am

An tats r teh r0xx0rz!

Lylmik
June 9, 2005 at 2:25 am

Yea, thanks for that Blaster!!!
Could be a myth, for all i know, but hey, it would represent the view of certain religios zealots about sex and the whole thing….
Man, the whole thing about whole religion issue really burns my ring…
Inquisition(what a splendid bunch of chaps!!!)were burning people for fuc- all, the tests they were conducting were absolutely ridiculous(my personal fav: tie a huge rock onto a nicelooking chick(witch), if she floats, they will burn her stakewise for being a witch, if she sinks, she’s fine and God is looking after her soul), the whole Crusade issue, killing infidels in the name of God, Vatican/McDonalds being the biggest landowners on the planet, with political influence to match….
Religion in my life is.
I believe, don’t get me wrong, but no funny skirted (10% of the bunch) child molester will tell me what to do with my life.
And as i understood it, probably true, the only reason most of christian priests are not to marry so their kids can’t claim part of their church for them.
Be a good person, don’t be an asshole the whole year and all peaches and cream over Chrismas, help people as much as you are able, don’t stick your nose where it doesn’t belong, do not come to my door trying to sell me your version of God on Saturdays because i like to sleep in, and i have no issues with you even if your skin is fuc-ing green.

Lylmik
June 9, 2005 at 2:27 am

Ah, forgot.

AMEN.

Madge
June 9, 2005 at 2:33 am

Lylmik, where the HELL did you get the “10% of priests are child molesters” statistic?

I think that’s utterly ridiculous as far as statistics go. Just because those are the only priests you see in the media doesn’t mean they’re the only priests on the planet.

(As for the pill being 99.9% effective: You have to marvel at my school, they go:
“The pill is only 99.9% effective. The condom is 20% at best because no-one knows how to put them on right and they break or slip all the time, which means that NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO, you’ve still got a chance of pregnancy resulting from sex”).

I myself am gonna be a prude and marry with my virginity intact, hopefully, (Assuming, of course, I don’t end up with a woman, which is not something I am opposed to in the least :)), but I respect other peoples’ decisions to act differently because I don’t think sex is wrong as long as it’s consensual and not causing diseases to spread.

THE END.

Blaster
June 9, 2005 at 3:21 am

LMAO. “Only” 99.9% effective. Such a thing would require thousands of sessions before the chance of pregnancy became significant. And the condom is certainly greater than 20% effective (assuming proper usage). Of course, improper usage could offer 0%, but this is precisely why people need to know what they are doing.
Ok, so let’s play by that scenario: assuming that the condom is 20% effective (which is bullshit) is equivalent to saying that the chance of pregnancy is 80%. And saying that the pill is 99.9% effective means that the chance of pregnancy while using it is .1%. So, if one is using both together, assuming that the failure of either method is independant of the failure of the other, the chances of pregnancy become .08%. All that was assuming that the woman was currently fertile, which we can assume for argument’s sake and for this rough analysis.
Now let’s assume that the efficacy of the condom to be a more realistic 90% (and this is still conservative). Then the chances of pregnancy are .01%.

And before my anger subsides, I was very offended by Xeno’s statement that I am so flippant about all this because I am a man. I was once in a long-term relationship with someone whom I loved deeply. If she had become pregnant, it would have greatly affected my life as well. But guess what? It never happened. We were using the pill.
Just because you’ve had some shitty male role models in your life, don’t take it out on me.

hobo
June 9, 2005 at 3:33 am

hi guys, just posting my view here.
i think that sex is the best thing a man and a women can share together, the most intamate loving thing.
for that reason, i have chosen not to have it until i am married.
that’s my view. i will not incriminate or scream at any1 elses, but i am inclined to sharing my view and helping ppl to understand it. btw, for the record, my pastor is married and has 2 beautiful kids. just cause the media shows us bad things about some christians, doesn’t mean we are all bad. i think Gandhi sed this, “Don’t lose faith in humanity. a few dirty drops in the ocean dont make the ocean dirty” or sumthing along those lines.

Munan
June 9, 2005 at 4:29 am

Such heated debate, what to add?

Me? I’m a carpe diem kinda guy. I’ll never marry, but I do like having sex occasionally. I’m in a monogamous relationship with my current girlfriend for 10 years now, but I did have one night stands before that and I refuse to give in to the suggestion that there’s anything wrong with that. I did not become a lesser person because of that and it certainly didn’t spoil my current relationship. And like Hobo, I too would promote this Herrickian view of life anytime and say “to the virgins, to make much of time”: “Gather ye rodebuds while ye may”!

( http://www.recmusic.org/lieder/assemble_texts.html?SongCycleId=483 )

Well, to be serious, I think it’s great to promote abstinence/fidelity (I hope I just spelled that right – English is such a ridiculous language when it comes to spelling) and thereby stopping the spread of veneral diseases.

But since abstinence and fidelity (did I spell that right?) are not everybody’s cup of tea, I think promoting condoms is just as great. And I do think some people here are a bit uptight about this issue, so pleas lighten up! It’s a beatiful day! (Here it is, at least, how’s the weather there?)

Ranka
June 9, 2005 at 10:46 am

Simple recipe:

1) use e-pills
2) use condoms
3) have sex only with people you love or like or trust or whatever

In my home country sex education in school starts at age 11 and continues through school. In this case, sex ed does not mean “wait until you’re married or you will DIE!” It’s also very common that parents give condoms to their teenagers and talk about these things openly.
Bottomline, I think the best way to avoid problems is to give out as much accurate information as possible.

What it comes to me, i’ve had sex with several guys, never been pregnant and never had std’s. I don’t feel dirty or sinful, because basically i’ve done nothing wrong. I’ve had my heart broken a few times, but that has nothing to do with sex and everything to do with the difficulty of loving. To me, marriage has nothing to do with sex. It’s a financial contract between two people (not necessarily man&woman) who want to share their lives and possibly properties.

Xeno.Morph
June 9, 2005 at 11:11 am

Blaster wrote:
And before my anger subsides, I was very offended by Xeno’s statement that I am so flippant about all this because I am a man. I was once in a long-term relationship with someone whom I loved deeply. If she had become pregnant, it would have greatly affected my life as well. But guess what? It never happened. We were using the pill.
Just because you’ve had some shitty male role models in your life, don’t take it out on me.

*Nothing is heard, but for the lonely chirping of some cricket a moron let into the house. Suddenly, the air is punctuated by the raucous laughter of a maniac, hysterical and slightly high-pitched.*

Methinks Blaster needs to sit in the corner for a bit to cool down. He takes things WAY too seriously. What I had posted was just me typing out loud, for you often hear about teenage moms and the fathers who claim it’s not their responsibility. Apparently, Blaster seems to think I have “shitty male role models.” How the hell would he know that? Even if it was true, is it any of his business? Hell, if it was true, I’d have done something to him, like hack him (If I knew how) or find out where he lives and then hack him in a more physical way. I have a very trusty hunting knife.

Bah, I don’t need to explain myself to the likes of him. He can think what he wants about me, but he’ll still be wrong.

Xeno.Morph
June 9, 2005 at 11:15 am

Hobo, I’m going to hack you and your non-existant computer just to see if it can be done.

*Later*

Yes. Except I can’t hack.

Madge
June 9, 2005 at 11:40 am

I am for DECENT sexual education like you wouldn’t believe

NOT the shit that my school teaches us, even if I agree with most of it, I disagree in that it’s a good idea to be teaching people who don’t share my views in this sort of manner.

In the Netherlands (or somewhere in Europe, not sure where exactly) they start sex ed at the age of six and they have the lowest teen pregnancy rate in the world.

Here in Australia, 70% of girls aged 15-17 have had sex.

In the US they had a thing called the “silver ring” campaign where people would wear silver rings that pledged they’d remain virgins until they got married.

There was a 95% failure rate, and these people had a 50% higher pregnancy rate.

In conclusion:

I think it’s best if you don’t do it until you’re in a stable, loving, monogomous relationship, but I know that’s not realistic for everyone, obviously, and there’s nothing WRONG with doing it anyway.

And if you’re gonna do it, YOU NEED TO MAKE SURE NOTHING BAD IS GONNA COME OF IT.

You have to love how the church is anti-artificial contraception and anti-abortion. I always wonder which is the greater evil – is it worse for me to get married and take the pill for 40 years, or to get married, not take the pill, have say two kids, and 5 abortions?

My school, in keeping up its “We’re all Catholics: WE HAVE VALUES” makes us do community service in year 10 and year 11. We get to choose where we go and most people just go to their grandparents and do gardening.

I went (mostly because I couldn’t find anywhere else, in year 10 at least) to this place that’s basically a house where people who are HIV+ can hang out and have some free lunch and they have masses in a few faiths there on different days, healing massage stuff, talks on how to eat right to be healthy and the rest of that junk. I went there again in year 11 because I learnt so much and it was so much more fulfilling the second time.

Anyway, it really opened my eyes. I signed a non-disclosure agreement both times, for a start – that’s the sort of discrimination people with HIV have to deal with, if I saw one of the people on the street I wouldn’t be able to tell anyone that they were HIV positive. Which sort of makes sense because as an employer you’d discriminate against someone who’s likely to be sick a lot and inconveniance you by dying in a few years, aren’t you?

Anyway, it’s really bad how this sort of thing affects people. I talked to this old woman whose son had died of AIDs practically the whole time I was there last year. She was telling me stories about her other kids, and it was just so touching and stuff.

I can’t really explain it, I’m not even sure why I’m talking about this.

But, seriously, the guy who ran the centre (which is actually catholic funded) was, for starters, not catholic, and also he was positive himself. Which I thought was really awesome of the place that funded it to do.

The guy talked to me for like half an hour beforehand and gave me stuff to read about AIDs, and he said something to the effect of:
“It’s great that you’re volunteering here, but your work doesn’t end here. You need to use these experiances to educate your peers to make sure they protect themselves”.

He also said that there were something like 21 different drug “cocktails” that help with HIV. You went from one to the other and it was random how long they lasted. He said he was lucky, he had only been through 4; some people who went to the centre had been through 19.

All in all, it’s a great place, but I only ever want to be going there as a volunteer.

But you guys all seem a responsible bunch.

As far as I’m concerned, you can have as much sex as you like as long as you’re wrapping your whapper before you whack ‘er.

(Sorry for that long rant, I just started typing and couldn’t really stop ^^;; )

Munan
June 9, 2005 at 1:37 pm

Well, Madge, thanks for sharing that. It’s not really the kind of thing I expect to read coming to this forum (I’m actually here for the sick pervert jokes and other stuff that makes working at this horrible office bearable (did I just spell that right, invaderjess?)). But thanks anyway.

You should talk to my brother, he went to South Africa two years ago to volunteer in an AIDS project for little children and he came back with the same kind of stories as you just wrote down and although I’ve always considered my brother as a rather silly person, that one single act made me so hysterically proud of him! IMHO he became a hero for it.

So, cheers!

And as for sex ed in the Netherlands: I got my first sex ed when I was 11. I really think 6 is a bit too young. 11 is fine.

KittyKat
June 9, 2005 at 3:40 pm

Love the strip!! This is gold!

Reminds me of myself and my friends, there’s nothing like seeing a friend on the phone to the person they are courting and shouting out ‘Yo! Your boy/girl friend is on the (mobile/home) phone – wants to know if they can come round… S’ok by me – Just no more sex on the kitchen table!!’.

As for the rhythm method I was raised quasi-catholic and my late father’s had 7 brothers and 6 sisters – all thanks to the rhythm method!! Again, loved the silent strip, I bet it saved you time and allowing us to interperet it ourselves was a h00t.

Private Whore
June 10, 2005 at 4:13 am

Madge wrote:
In the Netherlands (or somewhere in Europe, not sure where exactly) they start sex ed at the age of six and they have the lowest teen pregnancy rate in the world.

At the age of six? Well, not twelve years ago… but sex ed overhere sucks… all there is to it is the teacher putting a condom on a banana and some stupid ass video…

KittyKat
June 10, 2005 at 4:43 am

And the cartoon of a little girl ‘checking herself’ in the mirror. I still have nightmares..

If I had the powers, I would totaly reform sex education. It is a subject that education suits are so afraid of that we’ve been using the same material since the 80′s. I think sex education over here should cover more things and the things it already covers in greater depth, like the effect of alcohol on will power, the STD risk of ‘messing around’ (foreplay, oral sex, masterbation and anal don’t exist according to sex ed), the powers as 16+/18+ person when seeing a doctor, etc etc.

And of course Id start it at eight, I know too many 12 year olds who arn’t virgins, and they are not in the wrong – just they were niave.

Munan
June 10, 2005 at 5:04 am

Aramor, ben je Nederlands?

Thought I was the only one around here…

Quote:

At the age of six? Well, not twelve years ago… but sex ed overhere sucks… all there is to it is the teacher putting a condom on a banana and some stupid ass video…

sure brings back memories, if my memory serves me well, that video was quite explicit, produced as it was by Veronica (like, the playboy channel). And of course, the old condom and the banana… though we didn’t get to watch the teacher do it but had to do it ourselves in pairs of two, so heaps of bananas and rubbers – I remember some joker being creative with the beak of a very large stuffed seagull present in the classroom during that particular lesson and then the next teacher reacting quite hysterically to his experimenting.

Nifty Niftarius
June 10, 2005 at 5:26 am

A couple of things on this whole debate-

1) Although I think the sex-ed system in it’s current form sucks, I don’t think having sex outside marriage immediately makes you a slut

2) Being opposed to easy access to contraception, abortion, and welfare payments for single mums is not hypocritical. The general belief is that easy access to any of them just increases the rates of STDs and unwanted pregnancy because they promote complacancy. Condoms are only about 85% effective against AIDS (figures vary). A lot of women on the pill get pregnant when they simply forget to take the pill one day (trust me I know a few women who this has happened to). Some people actually have more kids they can’t support because they know the government will pick up the slack. And sadly, some women do treat abortion as a form of after-the-fact contraception. I know, I’ve met some who do.

3) Sex-ed often goes beyond the realm of letting teens know how the plumbing works to prevent pregnancy. A lot of providers go into horrendous details about things adults don’t need to know, let alone 6-year olds (eg- those nice ones in the US telling pre-teens about sex acts such as fisting). They’ve also often been caught out giving inaccurate information about the risks and effectiveness rates about types on contraception.

4) Groups opposed to abstinence classes have a tendancy to be in favour of such things as removing the age of consent altogether. Paedophiles are rubbing their hands.

5) Parents are rarely if ever informed of the content of current sex-ed classes. They assume its just what they got what they were that age. Are they in for a shock. It’s believed that schools try their upmost to keep parents out of the loop as they know they will object due the the graphic and one-sided nature of the programmes.

6) The rates of child abuse by Priests is lower than in the general population. A lot lower. You’re more likely to be abused by a family member or family friend.

7) Rates of unwanted pregnancy are a lot higher since the pill was introduced. Ahhhh…. the irony.

Ranka
June 10, 2005 at 6:29 am

When I was a child, I thought the rhythm method had something to do with the tempo of your.. well.. pelvis! Then, when I was taught that the rhythm method does not protect you from getting pregnant, I was just thinking: “hey, how stupid are you taking me for! Screwing more slowly won’t help much, huh?” :D

Private Whore
June 10, 2005 at 8:02 am

munan wrote:
Aramor, ben je Nederlands?

Thought I was the only one around here…

Quote:

At the age of six? Well, not twelve years ago… but sex ed overhere sucks… all there is to it is the teacher putting a condom on a banana and some stupid ass video…

sure brings back memories, if my memory serves me well, that video was quite explicit, produced as it was by Veronica (like, the playboy channel). And of course, the old condom and the banana… though we didn’t get to watch the teacher do it but had to do it ourselves in pairs of two, so heaps of bananas and rubbers – I remember some joker being creative with the beak of a very large stuffed seagull present in the classroom during that particular lesson and then the next teacher reacting quite hysterically to his experimenting.

Je bent echt niet alleen. Er is zelfs nog een derde, Mr. Spaghetti dacht ik. En Amyltrer kan al 17 nederlandse woordjes…

Also we had a biology teacher who thought it was funny to put some (well, more than just some) water in a condom and then start slinging with it and throw it in the classroom… well, whoop-di-doo…

desert_drum
June 10, 2005 at 2:49 pm

Aramor wrote:

Also we had a biology teacher who thought it was funny to put some (well, more than just some) water in a condom and then start slinging with it and throw it in the classroom… well, whoop-di-doo…

I have to give that teacher this much: As a lesson on how strong they are, it certainly would be memorable!

KTinNYC
June 10, 2005 at 5:16 pm

Nifty Niftarius wrote:

2) Being opposed to easy access to contraception, abortion, and welfare payments for single mums is not hypocritical. The general belief is that easy access to any of them just increases the rates of STDs and unwanted pregnancy because they promote complacancy.

A general but inaccurate belief. There are individual cases in which it’s true, but on a population level, it’s not.

Nifty Niftarius wrote:

Condoms are only about 85% effective against AIDS (figures vary).

Figures vary A LOT. The effectiveness is higher when people know how to use them, which I have to say *my* sex ed classes (in (Christian) middle and high school in the 80s) did teach.

Nifty Niftarius wrote:

A lot of women on the pill get pregnant when they simply forget to take the pill one day (trust me I know a few women who this has happened to).

Probably more than one day, but yes, this does happen. Which is why education is SO important- if this happens to a well-educated woman, she will use a back-up method for the rest of the month. If a woman doesn’t know better, she won’t, and is much more likely to get pregnant.

Nifty Niftarius wrote:

Some people actually have more kids they can’t support because they know the government will pick up the slack.
And sadly, some women do treat abortion as a form of after-the-fact contraception. I know, I’ve met some who do.

That’s their choice to make, not yours, thankfully. Abortion is not a physically pleasant procedure to undergo, so these women are definitely in the minority.

Nifty Niftarius wrote:

3) Sex-ed often goes beyond the realm of letting teens know how the plumbing works to prevent pregnancy. A lot of providers go into horrendous details about things adults don’t need to know, let alone 6-year olds (eg- those nice ones in the US telling pre-teens about sex acts such as fisting).

Sounds like you’ve been listening to too much sensationalist media again. That’s the sort of topic that might be dealt with in question box sessions, but not in general sex ed. I truly doubt any 6 yo would be asking about fisting, and for that matter, I’ve never heard of question boxes that young.

Nifty Niftarius wrote:

They’ve also often been caught out giving inaccurate information about the risks and effectiveness rates about types on contraception.

You’re talking about abstinence-only programs, right? Those are the ones that have been “caught” giving out a LOT of inaccurate info, including such bull as “HIV can be transmitted by sweat”.

Nifty Niftarius wrote:

4) Groups opposed to abstinence classes have a tendancy to be in favour of such things as removing the age of consent altogether. Paedophiles are rubbing their hands.

As someone involved in a very important group opposed to abstinence-only education, all I can say is BULL.

Nifty Niftarius wrote:

5) Parents are rarely if ever informed of the content of current sex-ed classes. They assume its just what they got what they were that age. Are they in for a shock. It’s believed that schools try their upmost to keep parents out of the loop as they know they will object due the the graphic and one-sided nature of the programmes.

Considering the federal funding limitation on US public school programs, one-sidedness = abstinence only.
I’ve not seen this uTmost most you’re talking about. I have seen parents that don’t particularly care what is taught- be it in sex ed or English classes. As with the rest of the curriculum, a parent that assumes their child is being taught the same thing they were taught as a child is a parent that doesn’t care enough to find out.

Nifty Niftarius wrote:

6) The rates of child abuse by Priests is lower than in the general population. A lot lower. You’re more likely to be abused by a family member or family friend.

I don’t know the statistics, but it’s obvious that a child is more likely to be abused by a family member or friend- they are in contact more. If you look at who is more likely to abuse (as opposed to who someone is more likely to be abuse by- big diff), I would doubt this.
Did you know that the HIV+ rate among priests is significantly higher than in the general population? Hmm…

Nifty Niftarius wrote:

7) Rates of unwanted pregnancy are a lot higher since the pill was introduced. Ahhhh…. the irony.

First, that’s not causative.
Second, the rate of unwanted pregnancy pre-pill was a lot higher than is generally reported- as was the rate of abortions.
Third, did you know that the rate of unplanned teen pregnancy has gone UP since Bush introduced abstinence-only education? Ahhh… the irony.

desert_drum
June 10, 2005 at 9:31 pm

Ho-leeee smoke.

Nifty, you might want to make a pass by this site sometime. Give special attention to the Post hoc error about halfway down the page, but it isn’t the only one.

News from someplace besides queerfeministcommieliberaldemonconspiracy.com might help as well.

Blaster
June 11, 2005 at 12:03 am

Nice, KT. You just saved me a lot of typing.

Munan
June 13, 2005 at 12:49 pm

desert_drum wrote:

News from someplace besides queerfeministcommieliberaldemonconspiracy.com might help as well.

No, you must be mistaken, desert_drum…

I’ve tried it, but that url leads to nothing… (which is a pity, in a way…)

desert_drum
June 13, 2005 at 10:44 pm

munan wrote:

No, you must be mistaken, desert_drum…

I’ve tried it, but that url leads to nothing… (which is a pity, in a way…)

Satirical humor: learn to recognize it on sight, because you’re likely to see a lot of it here. :)

neo-gigan
June 13, 2005 at 11:56 pm

Antidistinctlyminty wrote:
Damn fine work.

The graphical representation of the conversation meant I didn’t even have to read to enjoy the masterpiece.

Bernie, you are so in tune with your loyal slackers. I felt a little peaky today and wasn’t sure whether I’d be able to “read” your comic.

You made it so I didn’t have to.

Now, if only you could psychically beam the comics to us, so we wouldn’t have to turn on our computers and manipulate these pesky mouses…

Or, perhaps project them onto the night sky, Batman-stylie. Although, that would mean opening the curtains and looking upwards. Hmmm.

I’d be willing to do that, but I’m a fairly energetic slacker.

Cheers

Anti D.M.

dude, the thing is made with figures.but it still is a pretty kick ass comic.

Munan
June 14, 2005 at 3:22 am

desert_drum wrote:

munan wrote:

No, you must be mistaken, desert_drum…

I’ve tried it, but that url leads to nothing… (which is a pity, in a way…)

Satirical humor: learn to recognize it on sight, because you’re likely to see a lot of it here. :)

Yeah, well, actually I was playing silly…no really… really… Now how am I going to prove that?

desert_drum
June 14, 2005 at 3:32 am

munan wrote:

Yeah, well, actually I was playing silly…no really… really… Now how am I going to prove that?

I wonder if the name’s too long to register…. :twisted:

bewtifulfreak
June 14, 2005 at 3:43 am

munan wrote:

desert_drum wrote:

munan wrote:

No, you must be mistaken, desert_drum…

I’ve tried it, but that url leads to nothing… (which is a pity, in a way…)

Satirical humor: learn to recognize it on sight, because you’re likely to see a lot of it here. :)

Yeah, well, actually I was playing silly…no really… really… Now how am I going to prove that?

Well, if it’s any consolation, I believe you…in fact, I was going to suggest to desert_drum that was the case, but then I thought on the off-off chance you weren’t, I’d look like a doof – damn my insecurity! :}

desert_drum
June 14, 2005 at 3:47 am

bewtifulfreak wrote:

Well, if it’s any consolation, I believe you…in fact, I was going to suggest to desert_drum that was the case, but then I thought on the off-off chance you weren’t, I’d look like a doof – damn my insecurity! :}

Actually, I was too. I’m beginning to think I need to give up humor as a hobby around here! :cry:

Munan
June 14, 2005 at 4:16 am

well, i was.

But I know we dutch people have a reputation for being quite humorless, miserable bastards, so I can imagine why you thought I didn’t get the joke… 8)

And yes, I think we should register it… could be fun, especially now that http://www.conspiracy.org is out (it used to be a very funny site, though, some evil puppet master telling he ruled the world)

desert_drum
June 14, 2005 at 12:36 pm

munan wrote:

And yes, I think we should register it… could be fun, especially now that http://www.conspiracy.org is out (it used to be a very funny site, though, some evil puppet master telling he ruled the world)

It isn’t too long, anyway. The cutoff seems to be 63 letters, which means I could stuff another few words in there :)

neo-gigan
June 14, 2005 at 7:03 pm

desert_drum wrote:

munan wrote:

And yes, I think we should register it… could be fun, especially now that http://www.conspiracy.org is out (it used to be a very funny site, though, some evil puppet master telling he ruled the world)

It isn’t too long, anyway. The cutoff seems to be 63 letters, which means I could stuff another few words in there :)

um…… yea

Guest
October 17, 2005 at 10:49 am

imrumpf wrote:
This is for you, Digitaaliklosetti. It’s a very cheesy, crappy version with words so you can get the gist of it. No laughing please! :p

Yeah yeah i know I spelt Rhythm wrong…i’m just too lazy to fix it now…

if you made that i think your talented!

hypnosys
July 19, 2006 at 7:24 pm

First of all…
The rhythm method is not safe, by itself… specially in irregular periods…
This method has to be used along with the Billings method (basically cervical mucus gets thicken when you are fertile) and the Syntothermic one (rhythm plus basal temperature and autoexploration).
With these methods you’ll get an effectiveness of nerly 99.8%. Properly trained and well used, of course.
It can sound complex, but women can handle this very well and is not that difficult at all to see the signs.

The good thing about learning to wait and to respect the times of a girl is to understand ourselves and our bodies.
Why premarital sex is not good? Actually the answer is not for people that don’t care about love. Or for those who understand that love is the same as being "in love".

And I personally know people gave a try to this abstinence stuff until marriage (and weren’t virgin nor saints at all), and they can tell the great difference in their relationship.
One well-known couple was Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta Jones, she is Roman Catholic, he’s half-jewish. It seems that she insisted in this abstinece madness and he accepted. After marriage he said that the sex he had was amazing.

Ok, some people can consider this as the discharge of a surpressed urge, like not eating candies before dinner. Very possible. But the question here is not the physical pleasure, is the union of the souls.
Before marriage, we hang around and date with several girls at the same time and suddenly there is a girl with whom we fall in love. First of all, we think we are quite objective but everybody else can note that we act like idiots. But we don’t realize, why is that? There is something true in this saying: love is blind.
I bet that not many people ask themselves in a relationship if they really, REALLY know who’s that guy sitting in the other side of the table.
Is Everything ok?, then there is nothing to worry about. True?. Big error.
People are more interested to have a good time and to have fun instead of knowing each other. We feel that we are compatibles, and butterflies are all around.
And what happens then? suddenly the love has gone, she’s not more interesting. But it is already late, he’s children and is married with that stranger. It is not fun anymore. You are not ‘in love’ anymore, and you couldn’t forge love.

This blindness and idealization of the person is inevitable, we see what we want to see. Pheromones, Chemically compatibility and all that bullshit are strong enough to bring our attention to that girl.
Plus we are horny.
Have you ever tried to solve a question or think about paying bills when you are horny? Can Abe think anything else but sex?
And after all we fall in disgrace and we have sex.
Ok, now after the falling: at this level it is much difficult to think clearly, and it is much harder to know each other deeply. Why? Sex IS SO GREAT. If before we couldn’t see a candle in the dark, how can we see it now with a 10000w reflector in front of our eyes? Everything else is second importance.
And that’s the consequence when sex is not done inside the parameters that were made for, and love and sex are splitted. Nowdays sex is not for reproduction, increasing love and for union of the couple.
Sex is for fun. Sex is for pleasure.

What are the common denominator of Alcohol, Drugs, Gambling, Sex and Cigarettes?
First, all of above makes money.
Second, all of above are addictive
Third, All of above makes money BECAUSE are addictive.
Note: Addiction annhiliates freedom, free will.
Note2: In all these cases weakness, emptiness and ego are a market.

What happens when Alcohol is not controlled, when drugs are abused?
It becomes addictive. The same with sex. We can’t think another thing but sex. It becomes an obsession. Nowdays it is normal to hear that someone is like crazy because he didn’t stick it for three months. And if you can’t hold it, lets jerk off. Do you really think that it can be called integrity, a balanced mind?

Do you think it is really nicotine patches will help people stop smoking?
Do you think that fewer doses of drugs (alcohol included) will help those addicts?
Do you think that condoms will stop aids?

Agreeing with any of them is simply foolish. But it is quite interesting how people can shout easily "of course not" for the two first but not in the last one.

That’s why Chastity and Premarital Abstinance IS necessary.
It brings balance in our impulses. It powers our will. Gives real freedom, you can choose. It is not repression and is here where people get it all wrong. There are too many disinformation about everything and for some groups this is very beneficial.
As an example, for most of you the Natural way of contraception was an absurd and very ineffective. The information I got in the very beginning of this now very long post is supported by the WHO, World Health Organization. Probably you guys never heard about Billings and that Synto-something, and the less the people know about this, the less choices they have, the better for the condom, UIDs, pills, yadda, yadda and abortive companies. Even more some gynecologists don’t know what the hell is a Syntothermic method, and still think that natural methods are not effective. THIS IS ABSURD.

This natural way of contraception kills two birds with one stone. It helps us to mantain a rythm, we get to know not only our own body but the partner’s too and helps the dialogue and union of the couple. It is highly effective and is free.
All natural get balanced. After all, following nature is a way of following God, whether you have a religion or not.

So the answers for Why to Wait?
To get to know your partner better and save headaches later.
To get to know what’s the real LOVE, be less blind and don’t make irreversible mistakes afterwards (like unwanted pregnancy and abortion)
To get balanced and be an Integral person.
To avoid STD.
To keep your ass out of hell
To have amazing sex in your honey moon. (ok, if you are virgin maybe you need some kamasutra books)

See you,
Daniel

Samy
July 19, 2006 at 8:31 pm

having said that, i would so LOVE to go into some of the finer points of your OMFGLONG post, but i am very tired. i just have to get some things off my chest:
1) nice grammar :wink:
2) why should i stay abstinent for a god i don’t even think exists? (notice how i say "i think" instead of just stating it like a fact)
3) condoms can stop AIDS (at least to ninety-something% effectiveness). they are literally a wall between the schlong and the plumbing. just because too many people are uneducated dimwit fucktards that can’t use them properly doesn’t mean they don’t work (btw, uncorrect usage of natural methods makes those ineffective too! OMFG, WHAT???) and as has already been stated the pill is effective to 99,9%, so pwned natural methods :D
4) of course michael douglas’ sex was amazing, IT WAS CATHERINE ZETA JONES!
5)do you really think jerking off is evil, or not "integral"? it’s basic, healthy and helps to get to know your body, what you like, what you don’t like etc

unwanted pregnancies occur, but they are often due to a lack of knowledge of the subject and poor judgement. you don’t have to be abstinent, just responsible. of course, if you are one of the dimwitted fucktards described above, for heaven’s sake, stay abstinent!
(i don’t mean to insult people who want to stay abstinent, if i did so i’m sorry.)

hypnosys
July 20, 2006 at 1:37 am

do you really think my grammar is that good? hell, I should take the toefl test then…
All right, I think that you didn’t get the real meaning of my questions…
Or my grammar is not as good as you think…
I can take many sex jokes because, being honest, it makes me laugh.

But speaking seriously, I’d like to answer your points…
2) As i said before this is something beyond God (if can I say that…), is balance and nature. Not only christians say this, all religions have this, even asian philosophies like buddhists and confucianism adopt this. This is not FOR HIM, This is for YOU. Any rule and commandment are for your own good. Actually if you want to meet him, it is impossible without a pure heart. And this rules even if you want to meet him on Earth… anyway, you don’t believe, so what a shame =P
3) Condom effectiveness was scientifically proven in pregnancy but there is a question mark about aids… yeah, yeah, I know that this sounds religiously geek, but scientific methods used by NIH are in doubt yet. (I’m tired too to get in details and pasting links of scientific papers here..)
But even if it stops aids, (and this is known and proven) it doesn’t stop other STD transmittable by cutaneous contact like Papillomavirus and Genital Herpes (now there are some ads about it, haha, "I have GeNiTaL herpes"), and these two are still incurable, and if not treated you can get sterile. (or worse)
And speaking in a bigger picture, if condoms are the main point of a health policy, it will fail irremediably. It is not a health problem, it is a behaviour problem, a social problem with consequences in health. And that can’t be stopped with latex membranes. Just as cigarettes.
4) oh, yeah, I didn’t think about that… =P
5) Well, I’m not one of those who think that jerking off you are killing little men, or homunculus (yeah, that’s a funny age in science history). Actually the problem comes with the Purity itself, so it’s a whole bigger picture that engloves chastity, and the meaning of sex itself. As I see you are not interested in all this, I’ll make it simplier but probably you won’t be able to get the deepness (and wisdom) of this.
I’ll give a try. Did you know that actually the seven deadly sins are not sins by itself? Are just Bad Habits. These bad habits are the causes of sins or what eventually will push us to sin. And as everybody know, a bad habit makes us slaves. A downward spiral.
To counteract this bad habits we have what we call Virtues.
Example Lust Is a bad habit (a.k.a. one of the 7th deadly sins).
Sometimes these bad habits are not the causes, but the consequences of our sins. These sins are like little roots that feeds this gigantic climbing plant that suffocates our freedom. So cutting these sins one by one we can be released from our bad habits.

You know what is more interesting than this? That some bad habits are connected with others, and getting rid of one can help a lot to the next one.
I think there is something in common with macroeconomy, you’ll never see the whole picture unless someone explains to you, even the more slight modification of variables can change everything and common mortals won’t believe that or won’t understand. And what you first believed that nothing had to do with it, once you get it you can see that everything is related with all.

I’m sure there is a simplier way to explain it, I’m sorry, I’m reading Kafka… and honestly I’m relly tired… and my brain is making connections that only I can understand, I think… sorry I think I’ll give up… =P
Maybe next time…

PS:
The moral of the story is, masturbation is one sin, not an important one just like sex (not in the right time, extramarital, etc…). But ties our toes and blind us from the purity of God, as any other sin.

PS2: have you read the small prints in the masturbation leaflet? you know what having one or two there actually there is no health impact. But as I said before, sex is addictive, actually there is a syndrome called sexual addiction syndrome. Actually having only one dose of cocaine doesn’t do anything (apart of getting high… of course).
And some recent researches (i don’t remember the state of the research) that relates masturbation with psychogenic sexual dysfunction, although others say that it could help in prostate cancer… anyway…
I always say, lets see the whole picture people, the whole picture.
As in economics, the second richest guy is Warren Buffet (ok, here I am again with my crazy relations… I need some sleep)

See ya guys,
Daniel
Fake Korean, Fake Argentinian, Authentic Banana.

Ps: by the way, Alien Loves Predator rulez! :)
Ps2: this time I’m really tired to check grammar, spellings and yadda, sorry

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