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Monday, May 8th, 2006, 9:52am ET

And so Jews for Jesus was started.

One of the things I love about baseball is that there’s a statistic for everything. There’s all sorts of nerds who sit around all day and figure out who’s better than who at what, and how Babe Ruth would hit versus today’s pitchers (not very well - he’s dead), and crap like that, and they make up funny-sounding acronyms for all of it. I didn’t make up any of the stats in today’s episode - they all really exist.

Also, what other sport could have something like this in their official rules (see Rule 6.07)?

6.07 BATTING OUT OF TURN. … PLAY (6). Daniel walks and Abel comes to bat. Daniel was an improper batter, and if an appeal is made before the first pitch to Abel, Abel is out, Daniel is removed from base, and Baker is the proper batter. There is no appeal, and a pitch is made to Abel. Daniel’s walk is now legalized, and Edward thereby becomes the proper batter. Edward can replace Abel at any time before Abel is put out or becomes a runner. He does not do so. Abel flies out, and Baker comes to bat. Abel was an improper batter, and if an appeal is made before the first pitch to Baker, Edward is out, and the proper batter is Frank. There is no appeal, and a pitch is made to Baker. Abel’s out is now legalized, and the proper batter is Baker. Baker walks. Charles is the proper batter. Charles flies out. Now Daniel is the proper batter, but he is on second base. Who is the proper batter? RULING: The proper batter is Edward. When the proper batter is on base, he is passed over, and the following batter becomes the proper batter.

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Support aLp yes?   I had one kid too many




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Jurybreak

I did get dismissed from jury duty last week after they interviewed me for 30 seconds, but after I’d sat there doing absolutely nothing for 12 hours over 2 days. I learned a lot of interesting stuff about the process from watching and listening to everything go down, and from all the folks who emailed or twittered their jury duty stories to me - thanks…

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From the dark depths of my kids’ imaginations

The scariest movie I’ve ever watched with my kids is, seriously, Finding Nemo. Yet it’s like Elaine just pulls random things from my horror movie collection for them when I’m not looking, judging from the drawings that come out of their imaginations.

The 5th picture below looked to me like some sort of H.R. Giger inspired Alien; thanks to reader Wendy for pointing out it’s a dead ringer for Onyx from Pokemon.

Happy Halloween! And let’s hope you don’t see my kids on the news tonight.

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Achievement Unlocked: 10 Years

Today is my 10th wedding anniversary with Elaine. That’s crazy.

We’re on our way down to a gorgeous place near New Hope, PA for our first ever weekend without the kids! I’ll be live-blogging the whole thing, especially during our fireside massages*.

Today it’s incredible outside so when we get there we’ll be doing some lakeside biking. I’m happy to see Elaine’s wearing her aLp t-shirt that she looks totally hot in.

Happy anniversary baby, I love you.

* No I won’t.

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Hey my buddy Noah and I are starting an official aLp Killzone 2 clan, just for fun, just to find some more cool folks to frag around with. If we get enough people we’ll make clan-only rooms where we’ll blow each other’s heads up. If you can’t/don’t wanna join the clan, that’s cool; we can just be friends. All skill levels welcome. If you’re interested, leave a comment here or email me with your PSN ID, your email address, and where you’re from and you’ll get an invite.

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The aLp fridge magnets are back in stock! The first thing I did was plaster the mini-fridge at my office (click on the photo to the left - no the pics of my kids are not for sale).

Get yours today! Or you can come see me at my table at I-Con on April 3-5, and I’ll personally hand it to you.

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Thanks to everyone who submitted photos for the Be in aLp contest! Here’s the 6 winners for your pleasurable convenience…

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Thanks for all the emails and Facebook messages wishing me a happy birthday on Sunday! Not only does the internet have a way of skyrocketing the number of people who want to wish you a quick happy birthday, it also (thankfully) cuts down on the number of phone calls you have to answer. No offense to my brother, my aunt, and my mother-in-law!

Just wanted to share the birthday cards my (3-year-old) kids made for me. Here’s Rachel’s - ignore the writing:

In case it’s not obvious to you, I’m the figure on the left, Rachel’s the one diagonally down from that, and Adrian’s the one on the right, fittingly with a cupcake in its mouth.

Adrian drew what looks to be a facehugger or something attacking me:

WTF.

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How would you like to star in an official aLp episode?

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Saw this sign today. Can anyone figure out what it means?

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I’m on vacation! So I’m coming back at you next week on Tuesday! Even though I’m at peace with going this week without an update, you can go ahead and make fun of me if you want. I’m cool with it. All I know is aLp is still weekly after my week off and I’m still having fun.

I am hard at work on something - a birthday present for Elaine, who turns umpty-ump tomorrow! I’d show you what it is but there is the very, very small chance she might read this (she usually comes by only when the mailing list tells her to). All I’ll say is it does require a lot of the same activities that go into aLp. LIKE PROCRASTINATING LOLLLL

These are the two best things I got for Christmas:

Honestly I don’t know which one I love better. Joray Fruit Rolls are so good I literally almost cry when I eat them. They’re better than sex, at least in that they’re a whole lot cheaper to have 6 at a time. Thank you Elaine, for getting them for me, and also for forgiving me for that last sentence.

So yeah I got a PS3 too, which is really not good for getting anything done. I’m playing Prince of Persia right now, though it looks like LittleBigPlanet’s on the horizon. When I get a PSN ID, I’ll let you all know what it is, unless, like photos of me wearing my suit made of Joray Fruit Rolls, it’s something that should be kept private.

Reminder, follow me on Twitter which I seem to be able to update kinda frequently, and become a fan of aLp on Facebook, if for no other reason than all the cool people are doing it.

AND HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

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Alien vs. PredatorTM © 2008 Twentieth Century Fox Film Corporation. Alien and Predator toys © 2008 McFarlane Toys and TMP International, Inc. Other imagery, concept and writing © 2008 Bernie Hou.